LetsAllSitDown
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User ID: 507
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
My son didn't like sleeping on his back either, so we let him sleep on his tummy. That let him sleep for far longer stretches. We weren't too worried about him suffocating, because
- He's always been very assertive, strong, and active, and able to move his head
- We have an owlet smart sock on him that monitors his heart rate and oxygen saturation
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
I would suggest you start by putting him down awake.
We already do this. If it's me doing it, he just screams; if she does it, it's mostly working now, as long as she stays beside him. But when he wakes in the night, he expects someone to be there.
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
And are they all irreparably emotionally damaged?
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
Oh hey, hope you enjoyed by blogpost
I did; I don't like what it says about my future though. My wife was fairly on-board with "strict but chill" before the birth; I hope at some point she'll get there again.
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
Right, so how did you navigate this? Sending her links to fancy-looking blogs doesn't seem to be working for me.
In general, I've been trying to get the message across that parenting has been becoming way more time and money intensive than it used to be, with no better results. I'm the youngest of a very large poor-ish family, that is to say, my level of received parental investment was not super high, and I turned out fine. Meanwhile it appears Gen Z and Alpha have very little resilience.
He doesn't need so many toys. He'll be fine with 2nd-hand clothes. Don't be so worried about leaving him with other people for a few hours.
She wants a 2nd child, but I refuse if it's going to be this circus again.
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
6.5 month-old baby is not sleeping well. He wakes up frequently, wants his mother.
For the first few months, almost all his sleep was either co-sleeping (common in Europe, but it never felt safe to me), or in the presence of an awake parent (holding, carrier, stroller, car). For a while, we had some success putting him down after he fell asleep and him staying asleep for a few hours, but it would often take a long time to get him into a deep-enough sleep that he would staying sleeping upon being put down.
I eventually strongly suggested sleep training. I read stuff online, Emily Oster and others, and figured we should give the Ferber method a try.
My wife didn't like it; I found it difficult too, and actually I caved on night 3, even though it was kind of working at other times. But I regret caving and think we should have continued.
But our state-issued parenting advisor recommended a gentler method which I can't see working; it rewards his crying with attention; lo and behold, he cries every time he wakes up alone.
Now my wife and I are at odds; It's been 2 weeks of this with little-to-no improvement. She is getting less sleep than I am.
3 older women in my life whose opinions I respect (mother, aunt, landlady) all say we just need to do sleep training properly and stick to it.
The modern Zeitgeist says that sleep training is cruel, even if the studies don't. My wife's friends and family are on her side too. My wife was worrying that the 3 nights we did of Ferber method have ruined our son completely (on all 3 days after he was in a great mood all day...).
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
Thanks, I don't beat myself up too much; I just want to get slimmer.
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
The solution for me was, believe it or not, to eat less.
Yeah that's what I'm trying to do at the moment. I've never been a very conscientious person though, and this is a major weakness. It just takes up so much daily bandwidth. Some asshole has just brought in a packet of gummibears to work, and plonked them on a shelf right next to my desk. I feel like semaglutide might help me to ignore them.
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
I was very physically active until my son was born 6 months ago. But fullness and satiety have been decoupled for me for as long as I can remember. My stomach feels quite full quite quickly, but I still feel strong cravings.
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
I spent ages 9-24 obese (100kg). I got down to 73kg, but since 2021 have slowly been gaining weight. I came back from Christmas holidays at 90kg. Every day is a struggle. I would not say I have things under control.
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
I wouldn't say I'm from there, but I live there, yes.
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
I think it does have strict norms, and certainly my BMI wouldn't qualify.
just decrease portions
Basically what happens is, we go shopping, we buy some stuff, I buy some stuff, my wife buys some stuff. I do most of the cooking, and I remember the use-by dates of most of the food. Leftovers go into the fridge. I prioritise what I eat by what needs to go; she prioritises what she eats by what she feels like. I'm often finishing off food she bought but doesn't feel like eating; or leftovers that she swears she liked but apparently doesn't feel like eating again.
Perhaps it would be sensible to only buy enough food for the one meal, rather than having leftovers. Not sure what I would take to work for lunch though.
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
Have you tried replacing sugary food with food with artificial sweeteners
Yes, I now have a Coke Zero addiction. Sugar-free chocolate is available, but still fairly high-calorie. I don't have any really unhealthy foods available at home; there my main problem is that I just keep eating. 2nd portions, a bit more rice, whatever is available. I also grew up with very strong morals around food waste. My wife is happy to let stuff go to waste, so I'm left finishing a lot of soon-to-expire things by myself.
I've read about how Semaglutide reduces "food noise". Really, that would be heaven. I think about food way too much, and to turn off those constant cravings would be a boon.
LetsAllSitDown
4mo ago
I'm considering whether to try semaglutide. I live in Switzerland; I'm sure I won't get a prescription. However, a relative who takes it is visiting and can get me some. I'm hoping for Rybelsus; the pill form.
I've struggled with eating since I was about 9. The culture at home when it came to food was not great; I would describe it as somewhat competitive, kind of seeing who could eat the most the fastest. When I was 24 I finally managed to lose weight, but in the last few years it's been getting up a bit. BMI is now 25.5, not terrible, but definitely affecting my daily life. I always crave food, usually sweet food, and find myself snacking constantly if my willpower is down. I used to be able to keep somewhat of a lid on it by doing a lot of hiking uphill, but since the birth of my son I get almost no exercise.
I've never had any adverse reactions to medication before. Should I go for it?
I've kind of mentioned it. But she's very "what do you mean", and I'm struggling to express all the ways that her anxious parenting is stressing us all out.
It's stuff like
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