benny
1mo ago
https://www.astralcodexten.com/p/unpredictable-reward-predictable IV. points to that. In my mind I feel I've read something even more fitting how this delta of emotions isn't available to people in healthy relationships. But I can't find that post.
benny
6mo ago
That's certainly a choice. If you can keep it up it's great to own the majority of code. I'm generally in favor of keeping my dependencies few and small.
I'm exploring the browser as a platform to create small games. That's a huge dependency but maybe it means I actually get to a state of shipping something. :-)
benny
6mo ago
What is the technology you're going to build on top of? I'm not very much into roguelites but Pathfinder Adventure Card game sounds intriguing.
benny
7mo ago
I'm absolutely in favor of doing things and not just being. It's more about a shift in mentality. I think beating yourself up about not getting things done is long-term harmful. A real break would maybe get you out of the cycle.
Maybe I should've added that one has to try to adopt a new mentality: "Getting Things Done by Being Friendly to Yourself" instead of having the self-criticism angle and then when the regular self-criticism doesn't work, one just dials it up to 11, because that's the whip that always worked. Self-love and all those terms are not terms certain kind of people will accept, but maybe "being friendly to oneself" works for you.
I get shit done after this ongoing transformation and I worked on my most ambitious software architecture so far the last quarter and I only use the whip less than 20% of the time.
benny
7mo ago
Would it maybe be an idea to take a vacation from this hobby? I'm a pretty regular reader here and I don't think it's psychologically healthy to always be so critical of oneself about the progress one is having in an optional aspect of their life. I struggle with this myself, which is why I play the old wise man now. As Oliver Burkeman says: You don't have to think about it in terms of productivity debt that you have to pay off to be considered a human being. You are one.
benny
10mo ago
Thanks for the recommendation! Would you also recommend books by those two authors you've mentioned? I'm mainly interested in addressing an inner critic and not so much real trauma.
benny
10mo ago
Can anyone recommend me a book on Internal Family System or related modalities that explore multiplicities in your mind and how to address the ones that you may associate with negative behavior? I'm very woo-conscious (for better or worse) and I would like that not to interfere when starting out, as it appears there is something there.
I don't know if I'm a convert yet, but I bought medical tape for this purpose and you don't see any residue after the night and I wake up with clear nose. It stays on the majority of the time. The clearness doesn't last but I also don't have nose-breathing as my singular focus so I go into automatic mode again.
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