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Culture War Roundup for the week of June 16, 2025

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At the end of the day, modern relationship formation is less about the practical benefits as was the case for almost all of human history, and almost entirely about self-esteem and self-actualization; hence the rise of incels [who are bereft of the validation of being desired, not the literal act of sex] and romantasy fiction. How much does it validate me that I have a high status / hot / rich partner willing to have sex and be seen in public with me? Have I now truly found my soulmate, the ideal parent for my children? This is, of course, an impossible standard to meet for the vast majority of people and relationships and hence most people who think this way end up dissatisfied and unhappy - and yet without the illusion of self-actualization what else is there really to gain bonding yourself to someone else with a bond that is not a bond?

This is one of the most devastating and accurate observations I've ever read. It almost deserves its own post. I'm going to think on it a while and maybe lose some sleep - nothing else to add at this point, but chalk another one up for this being another unforeseen payoff of the Century of the Self.