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naraburns  nihil supernum  1yr ago (text post)   3301 thread views

Small-Scale Question Sunday for December 11, 2022

Do you have a dumb question that you're kind of embarrassed to ask in the main thread? Is there something you're just not sure about?

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I think it’s a male child accidentally socializing as a female identity, due to sheer accident or the way the women in their life treat them, or a repugnance to their father figure. This explains why homosexuals take on so much of female behavior and interests while still retaining the typical male kernel of hyper-sexuality and aggression

I'd caution against lamppost effect, here. Effeminate gay guys are more visible to the straights, but bara dudes, including bara dudes who want to bottom for other bara dudes, is absolutely a genre, and not a small one. A few of this demographic is bi-identifying, but a large and maybe larger number are either incapable or strongly opposed to sex with or even near women (and sometimes even effeminate men).

I'd also separately caution against conflating cause and effect. A lot of the bara dudes into bara dudes in the 1980s and 1990s spent a lot of their youth socialized with women of the same age group; there's a plausible story where the same effect that drives straight guys into 'girls have cooties' mode pushes gay guys into being less comfortable is a lot of typical male-male straight socialization contexts.

(Was absolutely the case for me.)

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