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Notes -
Yeah, there's similar drives behind surrogacy debates, and toward the gay mentor/'uncle' stuff comes from similar sources for men who can't have kids by blood.
It's... not a great situation. Even the best-case scenario for a 'down low' gay guy in a het marriage -- a wife that's aware and accepting, the guy being able to hit her needs, and a limited number of external partners that aren't Catching Feelings -- there's a tendency for them to kinda detonate as often as they work out. And most don't really achieve that level of openness, either out of fear or cowardice about coming clean to the wife, or inability to think with their bigger head if they try to button it up.
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