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PaperclipPerfector  5d ago (text post)   1593 thread views

Friday Fun Thread for April 3, 2026

Be advised: this thread is not for serious in-depth discussion of weighty topics (we have a link for that), this thread is not for anything Culture War related. This thread is for Fun. You got jokes? Share 'em. You got silly questions? Ask 'em.

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Again, I'd never been officially checked or diagnosed with anything, and some people just have general personality quirks. Not everyone connects the same way. If I did have it, I'm pretty high functioning and most people wouldn't suspect it. But even as I've gotten so much better, it's still never one of those things that never comes naturally. Socialization in general is one of those things that always gets easier the more you do it and everyone has bad experiences. How you succeed and in what environment depends very much on whether individuals find 'their people' and group or not. It feels much more natural and at home in the company of close family and friends. I've also strangely never had any problems speaking to large crowds or groups. I can do that with ease when others typically run away from the stage or podium.

It feels much more natural and at home in the company of close family and friends. I've also strangely never had any problems speaking to large crowds or groups. I can do that with ease when others typically run away from the stage or podium.

That's fascinating -- me too. I hate smalltalk and I struggle to make connections with a stranger, but I love public speaking even if it makes me nervous. My father is the same way, he is a teaching professor and an extremely animated one, but also extremely introverted and hard to get to know.

I've found, for me at least, it's about feeling in control. I have two ways coping with social anxiety: either curling into a ball and waiting out the clock until I can leave, or making myself the center of attention. Either way, I'm controlling how the rest of the room gets to interact with me.

Hm, interesting. I think for me, maybe for my dad, it's that the situation is structured and in public speaking you're given 'the floor' and people are socially expected to pay attention to you, or at least pretend. So it's an environment where you don't have to fight for airtime. I guess I also like it because it's a situation where you're permitted to monologue without interruption about a topic, which I always find enjoyable. Even if I have to improvise -- I enjoy improvising more than most people enjoy reading a prepared speech. It's like jazz.

But it's the back-and-forth and the fighting for airtime and the having to engage in real-time with ambiguous social dynamics that I find hard to deal with. It's difficult trying to figure out how to say something that's bland enough to not offend but interesting enough to achieve rapport, and then follow up, in real time, with a useful reply that continues that pace, with someone I don't know well.

That’s awesome. You and I are identical in this way. I wonder what explains people like us.

For me, it's about being able to control how others are interacting with me. Whether I'm in the spotlight or on my phone in the corner, it's better than trying to react to small talk. Small groups is just chaos and I hate them.

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