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I agree with this. However, many people seem to disagree with this, and they insist on making sure that people who think like you or me must behave like we think like them.
My personal preference is that trans people are free to metaphysically perceive their transness in whatever way they want and also to prefer that society at large respect that perception. I think the conflict comes from the ones who seem to believe that "respect" is a synonym for "submit to" and demand the latter under the guise of the former. IMHO, a trans person should be exactly as free to have the preference that others treat them like their felt gender to the same extent that everyone else should be free to treat the trans person like the gender that the treater perceives the trans person as.
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