SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
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User ID: 225
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
15d ago
Thinking over the examples you provided and the ones I provided, it seems like the key distinction is the underlying cause. In the case of gaining weight it seems like what is a problem is not the physical appearance per se, but rather the fact that your spouse isn't taking care of him/herself any more. In that light it seems fair to say physical appearance isn't important except insofar as it is the symptom of a problem one considers to be a character flaw. What do you think?
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
15d ago
Sure. But on the other hand that's not always the case. Sometimes people get disfigured in an accident, and I think most would agree it's immoral to leave your wife because she's not attractive any more after a tragic accident. And of course, we all get old and ugly in the end (or die young I suppose), and your relationship needs to be able to withstand that inevitable change. I think that age in particular makes it worth emphasizing the idea that you should love your spouse regardless of what they look like.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
15d ago
If it was as simple as choosing to eat less, we'd see far fewer fat people than we do. Nobody wants to be fat.
As @Walterodim said, you're confusing "simple" with "easy". Eating less to lose weight is indeed very simple, but it's not at all easy.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
15d ago
I always ask why don't they just clean up the place and rent it out and it's always a "eh, I guess I could do that, but eh, Im fine".
My wife and I have looked into finishing our basement. We don't have the skills to do a good job of it ourselves, so we would need to hire a contractor. We found out that it would cost us about $40,000 to hire a contractor to do that project. That's not an insurmountable amount of money, but it's not easy to come by either. So our basement remains untouched.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
15d ago
I think that this is a tough one. On the one hand, one should love their spouse without regard to physical appearance. But on the other hand, there reaches a point where you just don't find your spouse attractive any more, even if you still love them. And that's not good. These two things are obviously in tension, and it's really hard to say what the right balance is.
I don't think that there's a good answer for you here as far as the situation with your wife goes. I think you have seen already that the impetus for change must come from within her if it's going to work. So you're kind of stuck waiting for her to realize "hey I need to change". Right now it sounds like she's ok with the situation, or at least dislikes the idea of changing her lifestyle more. The problem is that everyone has a different trigger that causes them to change their mind, and it's hard to know in advance what hers will be.
If you do decide to hit the gym, I would focus on doing it for your sake rather than to inspire your wife. You might inspire her, it definitely happens! But I think that if you start working out with the explicit goal to inspire your wife to do better, she might pick up on that and resist it. Plus, you might start to feel resentful if you put in the work to get ripped and she doesn't care to join you. So I would say that you should focus on doing fitness for your own sake, and if your wife decides to join you that's a nice bonus.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
16d ago
Back then? It's still the case today. Mac is the worst computer platform for gaming. Windows is king, Linux at least has Proton to easily run Windows games, and Mac gets the occasional crumbs that get ported.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
16d ago
I've excoriated Rings of Power enough on here before...
I'm not convinced that there is such a thing as "enough" in this case. Please keep it coming. :D
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
16d ago
ME1 is the peak of that series, it's all downhill after that one (both in story and gameplay). It's a real shame. Years ago, I saw some comment online which said "I would love to play the trilogy suggested by that first game", and I agree wholeheartedly.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
17d ago
I really hate how people latched onto the Tidus laugh as "bad voice acting". The first time I played the game, it was clear that it was meant to be the character laughing in a forced, fake way. One can argue whether that's a good thing to have in a scene, but it isn't the VA's fault that he executed the script he was given.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
17d ago
Ooh, that's a good one. I wonder what the arguments people make against it would be. It seems obvious that nobody would want to be held to that standard, but of course the people making the land acknowledgements can't really say that without naked hypocrisy.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
18d ago
My impression (never owned one) was that the problem with Google Glass wasn't the tech, but social acceptance. It was at best seen as dorky, and at worst met with open hostility (e.g. the "glasshole" epithet). I think that's the issue you would need to solve. I hate to say it, but the solution is probably to have Apple make one. There won't be any meaningful improvement, but suddenly people will think it's cool because has a fruit logo.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
19d ago
Wow... that is mind blowing to me. I realize that I'm an outlier (I have only ever owned used cars, never spending more than $6k). But I didn't realize I was that much of an outlier.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
19d ago
To be honest, I can't even tell North or South Indian folks apart. Then again it's not like people wear a badge saying what part of the country they are from, so unless you know the differences already it seems like it would be hard to suss out. The only thing I know about different regions of India is that a friend at a previous job (from Chennai) used to talk so much shit about North India, lol. I always took that with a grain of salt but it was pretty funny how much trash he would talk about North Indians.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
19d ago
I guess I don't know statistically what the median is, but to me (and I think to most people I know) $35k is kind of expensive. Not like hella expensive, but enough that it would be out of reach for a lot of people.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
20d ago
To be fair, your price range (which is what, 15-25k USD or something?) is nicely lined up with the safe/boring/respectable market segment. Not saying you can't get fun cars in that range, but the practical cars dominate.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
24d ago
I don't quite follow. If one never uses the centralized service then surely there's no problem? Because then there are no "friends" for it to share your data with.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
24d ago
I'm so devoted to not relying on centralized services I went with Jellyfin instead.
To be fair, Plex isn't inherently centralized. They offer that, but it's perfectly possible to not ever hook your media server up to their centralized service.
Yes, absolutely. I do so because I think the idea of renting access to your media is insane, and it baffles me that so many people seem to be ok with it. Similarly, I also buy and rip physical versions of any movies or TV shows I really enjoy.
Also as far as music goes, I have no interest in discovering new music. I've been listening to the same music for about 20 years now, so Spotify has no actual value to offer me.
For methods, either I buy a digital download or I rip the CDs I own. Tag them, and then put them in Plex media server. They make a pretty good player (Plexamp) for mobile, though the desktop version was dog shit when last I looked. On desktop I use the web player. It works pretty well, and basically fills the use case I had for Google music back before Google killed that off.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
1mo ago
It's an interesting point, but I don't think that edge cases existing mean that the definition is wrong. Sure, if we wanted to we could spend probably hours to hammer out a definition which solves all the edge cases. But that's true of any definition.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
1mo ago
There's an annoying chilling effect when it comes to the sex crimes where any attempt to differentiate between degrees of wrongness is seen as moral endorsement.
Yeah and it's incredibly annoying. I have learned the hard way to expect that sort of bad reasoning from normies, but I didn't expect to encounter it here of all places.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
1mo ago
I took "too drunk to say no" as "they will say yes to anything because their inhibitions are lowered", not "they're so drunk they can't even respond". The latter case would be rape, but the former isn't.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
1mo ago
This is exactly right. I think that if an adult has consensual sex with a teenager, that's not OK (with various edge cases as we know from statutory rape laws). I think if anyone talks a 9 year old into having sex with them, we should lock them up and throw away the fucking key. But it's important to maintain the meanings of terms, so I think they should be under different laws than rape because they aren't the same.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
1mo ago
If you can't decouple your sense of moral outrage at bad acts from a discussion over what words mean, you're going to have a real bad time on this forum. My position here isn't even that spicy. We have a guy who literally argues for pedophilia being OK, we have people who think that the Jews are to blame for everything, etc. Saying "I think x act is immoral but it doesn't fall under the definition of y" doesn't even register compare to some of the arguments here.
SubstantialFrivolity
I'm not even supposed to be here today
1mo ago
That's certainly an edge case. But I don't think it invalidates my position.
That's fine, but that's not the implicit claim that was being made. The implicit claim was not "CICO isn't likely to work", it was "CICO is not simple". As such, the distinction between simple and easy is relevant.
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