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Culture War Roundup for the week of March 20, 2023

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This type of behavior is exemplified by shows in the 2000s like Gilmore Girls, where you have a single mother who is consistently acting like a teenage girl, while literally getting emotional support and advice from her teenage daughter. You can have your cake and eat it too folks - have a kid while also having a fun teenage buddy to chat about boys with!

Oh man I have thoughts on Gilmore Girls. ((Weirdly this is "Chick flick analysis on themotte" day for me)) My wife watches it all the time, it's her anxiety blanket of a show. Which is weird because she kind of hates it too.

The whole series is fascinating when you consider it in light of the reboot. To summarize for the vast majority of straight men who have no idea what I'm talking about: Gilmore Girls tells the story of Lorelai and Rory Gilmore, a mother and daughter living in Connecticut, and then to a lesser extent Rory's wealthy grandmother Emily. Lorelai got pregnant as a teenager and ran away from home, despite coming from a wealthy family she worked her way up through service industry jobs at hotels because she cut contact with her rich parents after getting pregnant, raising Rory as a single mother with virtually no contact with the father and no long term partners (iirc); Rory is a brilliant child and always presented as destined for great things, going to a fancy private high school before going to Yale. As Dag said, the core of the show is the mother-daughter relationship, and to bring it back to my original diagram it fits right in! Emily is the thesis, staid, stubborn and traditional, a controlling DAR matron; who uses her money to control the lives of her subordinates and family. Lorelai is the antithesis, she chooses to cut all contact with her wealthy parents and work low-class jobs rather than put up with her mother's controls. Rory is the synthesis, the star-baby, contrasted with every other character that must choose a side she is all things to all people, she is able to bring peace between the prior generations, she is comfortable with the commoners and with the aristos, she can walk with Kings [but not] lose the common touch. Her graduation from Yale with plans for a sparkling journalism career is the culmination of the first run of the show, all is solved and all is golden, Rory will avoid Emily and Lorelai's mistakes while hanging on to their positive qualities.

Then Netflix came along with a truckload of money to run a brief reboot Gilmore Girls: A Year in The Life which ran four episodes, and revisited everyone's favorite characters. (Except Melissa McCarthy, who they could only afford for a cameo after she was a side character for the original) A bunch of irrelevant shit happens, but the main points are (spoilers ahead) Rory is unemployed and broke and moves back in with her mother, having failed to have a sterling journalistic career or to succeed in any other field, has no long term romantic partner while having a series of flings, and in the climactic final scene reveals to her mother that she is pregnant. Which sets the entire prior point of the show on its head: Rory isn't the starchild after all, she is instead trapped in a cycle of failure and single motherhood. Rendered incapable of forming real romantic commitments by the lack of a father figure or a strong male presence in her early life, she allows herself to be used as a side piece, convincing herself that her refusal to commit is her freedom, when in reality it traps her and those around her in an endless cycle of slavery. The first seasons of the show are tragic in light of this conclusion, knowing that Rory won't make good makes her journey through Chilton and Yale Sisyphean rather than Herculean, the ultimate destination is right back where her mother started: single, jobless, and pregnant in small town Connecticut.

At a meta level, this is the difference between late Washington Consensus/End-Of-History plots (Gilmore Girls debuted in 2000), and post-Obama plots. The first seven seasons hope to reconcile the family, to bring everything together in a hopeful conclusion. The Netflix reboot tells us all of that was nonsense, we're all trapped in a cycle of failure, nothing matters or will ever get better. The characters that come out of the reboot looking smarter are those who didn't try: Lane and Zack "tend their garden;" they have kids together, they still play music, and they're happier than the Faustian characters like Rory and Paris who were supposed to be their natural betters. The best Rory can hope for is that her mother's journey will bring understanding to her journey with her own child...but how much fucking understanding do we need before one of these girls can father a baby in wedlock for a change?

I'm coming from a place of complete ignorance here; before reading this summary, my best guess at Gilmore Girls would have been that it was some dramedy about a friend group of female senior citizens. Do you know how longtime fans of the original series tended to react to the Netflix sequel? The way you describe it would make me guess that it got a mostly negative reception, similar to many sequels/reboots/reimaginings/etc. that have come out in the past decade, and I'm curious what the actual reception was.

I can only really tell you that my wife hated it. It was probably something that everyone watched but no one was really satisfied by.

I agree with your summary, although I'd argue Rory and Lorelei's fall from grace started in the last two seasons (I had to check the Wikipedia summary to remind myself of when stuff happened exactly) where it seemed like the writers had them just starting to act much dumber than usual in attempt to create dramatic tension. It felt like the writers were actively avoiding letting them be happy. And the reboot just turned that up to 11.

To be fair, although the show focuses on their point of view so it's not obvious at a glance, Rory and Lorelei are pretty terrible self-centered people, so it's hard to feel too bad for them.

Man, I could put up a whole new effortpost about how bad Rom-Com TV shows are at writing happy marriages. Having written themselves towards a marriage that should be happy, the writers typically either need to throw up strange obstacles to create tension, toss one of the characters the idiot ball so they fuck it up, or they just draw out the process of getting together/marriage for so long that the audience gets restless.

GG suffers from the latter in the late seasons, Rory has met Logan and Lorelei is with Luke openly, but they can't just have happy marriages so they keep drawing it out with increasingly strange obstacles and weird reticence to commit. HIMYM did the idiot ball thing, from what I recall of friends complaining about it, with the couples creating drama by going off the deep end completely at random. SATC would have no idea how to write Charlotte's first marriage, so they just gave him terminal ED. The Office, I never watched in detail but people generally say it peaked at the Wedding and declined thereafter.

Even the Big Bang Theory, I will go to the mat arguing that the first season was brilliant (to me as a nerdy 16 year old with a group of friends fairly well described as a mix of Indians, Jews, and autists). But they had no idea how to write it once they coupled the characters up. The first season is a classic Rom-Com, and ends with the leads kissing, as a self contained story it works. After that the show went into terminal decline, they had no idea how to deal with the unrealistic aftermath.

Hooray for the /comments page. It's a shame there's no "/comments, but just the ones replying to two-week-old threads, since everything else is easier to read threaded" page.

Man, I could put up a whole new effortpost about how bad Rom-Com TV shows are at writing happy marriages.

I'd love to see this in Friday Fun some time.

... especially if you've got any thoughts about "Mad About You". I barely remember it now (though now I find out there was recently an 8th season, produced decades after season 7!?!), and what I remember does include a few "idiot ball" episodes, but I remember thinking decades ago that it really stood out from the crowd of implausibly-drawn-out "Sam and Diane" "will they wont they" romantic melodrama subplots. The main characters were a happily married couple from episode 1, the show A plots were about their interpersonal issues with each other and family and friends, and yet IIRC they managed to get several seasons out of that without most of the spousal issues being ridiculously foolish or melodramatic. IMDB says there wasn't much quality decline until halfway through season 6.

I haven't watched the show, but doesn't this go back to the basic rule of Story that the OG happy ending is a wedding, always was and always will be and the audience know this, and don't want to change it.

If you run Rory's story forward, either she needs to get married (which from the perspective of the people making the show defeats the point), or she needs to end up in a relationship such that the future wedding can be implied, or you need to deal with the fact that she is going to end up with a life the vast majority of the audience don't want.