The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
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Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
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Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
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Are there any good resources to reference on how to have good straight sex?
I really like this girl, but my previous sexual encounters were three one night stands in undergrad that I remember little from.
We've had sex twice, it's been terrible and it's mostly been me. I really don't know how or what to do tbh. I don't want to admit my complete ignorance and I can tell it's not working for her. In that despite everything else being great, the relationship is going to be over if we can't fix this. Like everything else being so great is why she's been willing to continue this despite the bad sex.
Like I could just let this run it's course and take these lessons to the next relationship or something, but I genuinely really, really, really like this girl and I want to at least reach out for advice of some sort in the off chance some advice can make it not terrible and we can actually possibly make this work.
I know this is probably not actionable for you at this point but this kind of stuff is yet another reason why "wait until you're married for sex" works so much better. When we got married both my wife and I were completely inexperienced (we were both virgins) and we were both terrible at sex. But because we were married and trusted each other, there was nothing hard about admitting ignorance and inexperience and hangups, and now we have had years to get good at making each other happy. I have no clue whether anything I've learned is transferable or not, but I don't have to care because I only have to please one woman, not all of them.
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