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I think that's less of a thing than it used to be. Social groups/interests are more gender delineated, workplace flirtation isn't what it used to be due to the potential massive ramifications of going too hard.
I spent about a year in 2022 dating a bunch of educated, upright upper-middle class 25-35 year olds with a view to finding a wife with whom to have children. I now have wife + child, but the experience made me think that the issue is that a lot of the shyer girls just only very sparingly spend time on the market. They'll download an app for a week or two until they have a meh date or get distracted, then either find a mate or delete the proverbial app for 6 months before quarter-heartedly trying again in hopes of their Prince Charming happening to be in the first 2-3 serious conversations they strike up on the app before the next deletion.
Also these women are truly inexperienced, which means those brief forays are more likely to go anywhere since the mindset is more 'formulaic husband interview' than anything romantic. I had about 60 first dates in 2022, 50 or so of which would fit into the broad category of educated women looking for something serious with actual careers and an intent on 'settling down' and I found about half seemed to legitimately be completely inexperienced romantically.
Notably, though, getting MeTooed for coming on too strong is rather less of a concern for women, and explaining why fewer women use dating apps is exactly what @Quantumfreakonomics wanted explained. If the workplace dating scene is hostile to men who are proactively looking for a partner, but less so to women who are doing the same thing, that fits pretty snugly with a lot more men than women turning to dating apps.
Yes but the vast majority of women are not proactive in approaching in person, so if men are unwilling to be the first to initiate interest that's going to have a large impact on the amount of inperson relationships being kindled.
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Uh, what? Are we even talking about the same concept at this point? How does one both have the opportunity to go on 60 first dates in a year and also none of them go well enough to terminate the process? Is this some poly thing?
My guess would be that women on the apps always have a better option than you. Unless you're obviously her Prince Charming on the first date, why would she bother on a second date if she's matched with five other guys in the last hour?
In my dating days I used the apps and had lots of first dates but far fewer second dates. It's possible that I was just a bad date, but then I didn't have the same issue with girls I met in real life.
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Oh I'm married and with child now, having finally struck gold with the 60th but I did a ton of field anthropology along the way.
I live in a majorish metro, managed to work my way up from a 5/10 to like a 7/10 through weight loss + trial & error and essentially didn't turn down a first date with anybody who was open to get a coffee and not obviously a hard no.
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