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Wellness Wednesday for January 11, 2023

The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:

  • Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.

  • Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.

  • Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.

  • Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).

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If your problem is anxiety, I think that dwelling on the notion that your brain or mind are broken is only going to make your anxiety worse. I find thoughts like that to be very distressing and create a lot of anxiety for myself.

I think I explained this better in a follow-up comment, but it's really about accepting that my brain's danger alert system is broken. It's on a very high sensitivity setting and gives me too many false alarms. Understanding that I don't have to pay attention to every alarm has been very helpful.

Why? If it's not affecting your work and your life, then what makes it bad? The rendered opinion of therapy cultists that Mental Health is Important? There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so.

It's actually the therapists who are telling me that I should accept living with anxiety and it's not necessarily a bad thing. However, I find the visceral experience extremely unpleasant, and I don't understand how to come to peace with that. It's like trying to convince myself that a headache doesn't hurt. That's the big stumbling block I have hit.

Don't give up on changing the way your brain works. It is possible even if it takes a long time and hard work. Most therapists see anxiety as an unchangeable condition of the brain, and if you accept that premise it basically makes it impossible to change.