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Culture War Roundup for the week of December 29, 2025

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I was engaged to be married and the woman decided she wasn't attracted to me, after being together for years.

Therein lies the paradox of commitment.

By committing, a man is signaling that she is the best that he can do, in which case she may be subconsciously wondering if she can do better. This is especially pertinent now more than ever, when she can easily get attention from better looking or (perceived to be) higher status men on social media and/or OLD—if she doesn't already have such men giving her likes on social media and sliding into her DMs.

When she perceives that she's his only option, she may start to lose attraction for him and start getting the ick. In contrast—prior to commitment—there are tailwinds from female mate-choice copying in tingle induction, when he's still seeing other women or she's under the impression that he might be. As one chick put it, "im glad he doesn’t have hoes but why does he not have hoes??? am i fighting for a spot no one wants??!!"

I used to want a wife and a family but I have given up on that dream.

You can have a family without a wife, even without spraying and praying. Egg donor + surrogacy costs only a few tens of thousands to a couple hundred thousand USD, depending on your location and your willingness to use a foreign surrogate. If you're white-collar-coded, people might seethe at you for cheating at life by having a child or children without getting gatekept by the step of marrying a woman, but haters gonna hate.

I am skeptical about the thought of raising a child without a mother in the home.