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In a society which exalts women, and values their opinion as much as todays western does, men alone cannot redefine what a man is.
Greater acceptance of short and passive men among men, wouldn't alter how the they are perceived by women.
There is a contradiction here in how you cite only examples of men. The disparity between how intrasexual relations are between men, who encourage other men to try harder, to put in more for effort, to achieve greater things, versus how they are between women, where exaltation of self-improvement in the field of femininity isn't common, of praising the most womanly woman, who is great at all things associated with the fairer sex.
One could blame contemporary feminism, which in its vulgar form is interpretted as women being deserving of high status by their mere existence, while men have earn their worth; and the absense of parallel movement as influential which would tell men they are Kings no matter their lack of achievements.
Thus one would expect the sex which, you claim, gatekeeps membership in it would less commonly transitioned into, than the one which places less value on what makes its sex special. Yet as "What is a woman?" is due to feminism each year given a greater variety of answers, trans men are growing faster than trans women.
I agree, which is why I label it as the most important job for Feminism to help promote the careers of professional women.
I cited only examples of men because I am a man, I experience life as a man, so it's easier to write, and the post was long enough without getting into women. But I think women suffer from an equally destructive set of societal expectations in today's world. A pretty girl used to be pretty enough if she was top ten in a high school class of one hundred, now she has to be prettier than thousands, pretty on a scalable level. But also a young professional girlboss, but not too successful then men won't like you; smart but not too smart. A 40 year old middle class housewife 100 years ago had pride, easy and carefree, secure in her home in her husband in her children in her place in the community. Today we expect women to be all things at all times, and we never give them security. We expect a 40 year old woman to fuck like Samantha from Sex and the City, to Lean In like Sheryl Sandberg, to mother like a Mormon mommy blogger, or maybe to Tiger Mom like Amy Chua, to craft and decorate like an Insta influencer, to never get old but never be young and naive either. She is to raise her kids to be independent and leave her and maybe call her once a month after, she is to love her husband who at any time might leave her alone having wasted her first fruits in sacrifice to a false promise of forever.*
Transmen equally view being male as an accomplishment, as a project to create meaning in their lives. Transmen are satisfied with being male, they don't have to strive to be ubermensch when mensch is good enough.
*Very, vanishingly few women benefit from divorce. It is mostly a negative sum transaction. It is popular for men to view themselves as the victims, and therefore women as the putative victors; in reality as in Roadhouse nobody even won a fight.
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