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Culture War Roundup for the week of July 10, 2023

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Life offers a Better "Minimum Deal" to Women than to Men - Change my Mind?

  • Men are vastly more likely to be victims of the worst kind of violent crime: murder. In the US, 82% of total homicide victims are male, 18% are female. Women probably endure more sexual violence, but men definitely endure more violence overall given the 4:1 murder ratio.

  • Men do the overwhelming majority of the nasty, dangerous work, such as roofing in the summer, oil rig operation, management of sewers, garbage collection, etc.

  • Men are much more likely to be homeless (70%:30%) or imprisoned (93%:7%). I think this speaks to the greater competitiveness of the male world: If a man fails in life, he's judged a complete fuckup, and ends up a homeless low-status loser. If a woman fails, she can almost always just get married.

  • Men are much more likely to kill themselves (4:1). Although women attempt suicide more than men, men use dramatically more lethal means (hanging, gunshots, jumping). Because I'm not so sexist as to claim that women are too stupid to know how to actually succeed in killing themselves, I conclude that the difference in suicide methods reflects a difference in willingness to die. (And in any case, even when controlling for method, men manage to kill themselves more effectively than women.)

  • Men spend much more time on the job than women (41weekly hrs:36.3hrs/week). (This remains true well after the children leave the nest. And no, I'm not persuaded that childcare is harder than conventional employment.)

  • The law heavily favors women in child custody and child support disputes, and the institution of alimony transfers far more male wealth to women than female wealth to men.

  • Men are much more likely to die in combat; in fact, during serious military conflicts, they face military slavery (“the draft”). (In Iraq, women were 2.9% of all American combat deaths, men the other 97.1%; in WWII, of the 292,000 members of the US military who were killed by enemy fire, only sixteen were female. Women made up only 0.1 percent of the military's 405,000 war-related deaths.)

  • Our culture automatically cares more about female suffering and wellbeing than male suffering: "The ship is sinking! Save the women and children first!" Male job candidates are significantly more penalized for crying than women; subjects express that it appears that a woman in distress is taken more seriously than a man in distress.

  • The dating market is more competitive for men than for women; women are far more selective than men about sex partners. Imagine an attractive person of the opposite sex walking up to you on a college campus and saying, “Hi, I’ve been noticing you around town lately, and I fnd you very attractive. Would you have sex with me?” How would you respond? If you are like 100 percent of the women in one study, you would give an emphatic no. You might be ofended, insulted, or just plain puzzled by the request. But if you are like the men in that study, the odds are good that you would say yes— as did 75 percent of those men (Clarke & Hatfeld, 1989). As a man, you would most likely be flattered by the request.

  • Women are more likely to be superficially treated as mere "sex objects" by men. That said, men are more likely to be superficially treated as mere "success objects" by women.

  • Women now comprise nearly 60 percent of enrollment in universities and colleges and men just over 40 percent.

The "minimum deal" of life for men is worse than for women. The "minimum deal" for women seems to be "get married." The minimum deal for men seems to be: become homeless and kill yourself, if you aren't murdered first. Yes, men make more money and enjoy greater prestige because men are overrepresented at both the top and the bottom levels of society. But the degree to which being at the bottom of society hurts you is greater than the degree to which being at the top helps you. That is, it's so much more bad to be at the bottom than it is good to be at the top. Just ask yourself: would you rather experience the greatest amount of pleasure possible for 20 seconds, followed by the greatest amount of suffering possible for 20 seconds? Our response tells us that there is not a 1:1 ratio of pleasure to suffering. How about 30 seconds of the greatest possible amount of pleasure for 20 seconds of the worst possible amount of pain? 40:20? 50:20? I think this is why men kill themselves more.

According to Christian legend, God told Adam and Eve before their ouster from the garden of eden: "man shall live by the sweat of his brow, and woman shall suffer the pain of childbirth." Modern technology has greatly minimized the pain of childbirth, but has it equally lightened the burden on men's shoulders?

I won't deny that men do much less childcare and housework than women, and non-custodial fathers provide little financial or parental support for their children. Also, men are the perpetrators, and women are the victims, of the vast majority of sexual violence. (Although I'm not sure what the stats at prisons do to this balance; apparently rape in male prisons is a huge epidemic and is vastly greater than rape in female prisons. Considering the ridiculously disproportionate number of men in prisons, it's possible that this balances out.)

Anticipated objection: "But men are often the primary perpetrators of the issues facing men." This is irrelevant to the post title, but in any case, I think this is like saying "it's not bad that humans are victims of murder because, after all, all of the perpetrators of murder are also humans." The identity group to which the perpetrators belong is irrelevant to whether an individual was treated unjustly if the perps and victims are different individuals. This simple-minded identity-politics is like saying "someone with red hair beat me up when I was 12. Therefore, it's okay for me to beat someone up today, so long as they also have red hair (regardless of whether they are the same person)."

For some reason copy/pasting my post over to this website deleted all of the hyperlinks. It would be a big time waster to fix that so I'm just going to suffer the blow to credibility that may or may not cause. (For what it's worth, a simple google search should give you all of the same ratios above.) I originally drafted this for CMV on reddit, but the mods took it down.

The dating market is more competitive for men than for women; women are far more selective than men about sex partners. Imagine an attractive person of the opposite sex walking up to you on a college campus and saying, “Hi, I’ve been noticing you around town lately, and I fnd you very attractive. Would you have sex with me?” How would you respond? If you are like 100 percent of the women in one study, you would give an emphatic no. You might be ofended, insulted, or just plain puzzled by the request. But if you are like the men in that study, the odds are good that you would say yes— as did 75 percent of those men (Clarke & Hatfeld, 1989). As a man, you would most likely be flattered by the request.

I'm sympathetic enough to the general post that I actually want someone to debunk it (I've swung a little too hard towards Caplan and Hanania on this I feel) but this seems like the weakest point.

This can easily be put down to evolved sex differences: women have more risks and less benefits from casual sex..

See, this is actually the argument for feminism: why should men's internal experience and preference be the standard here?

Clarke & Hatfeld, 1989

Looking at it, it says:

Describes 2 experiments conducted in 1978 and 1982 with 96 university students testing the hypotheses that men are more eager for sex than are women and that women are more likely to set limits on such activity.

Look deep within your heart, Tanista, and tell me you are really surprised that a bunch of young men at peak horniness years would go "oh yeah baby" when a hot chick asked them "so big boy, wanna have fun"? 😁

Describes 2 experiments conducted in 1978 and 1982 with 96 university students testing the hypotheses that men are more eager for sex than are women and that women are more likely to set limits on such activity. Related literature and data are also reviewed. In the present experiments, male and female confederates of average attractiveness approached potential partners with 1 of 3 requests: "Would you go out tonight?" "Will you come over to my apartment?" or "Would you go to bed with me?" Results were almost identical for both experiments. The great majority of men were willing to have a sexual liaison with the women who approach them. Not one woman agreed to a sexual liaison. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2016 APA, all rights reserved)

I mean, yeah, big difference between "Would you go out with me on a date?" and "Forget even dinner and flowers, wanna fuck?" Men and women are different, sorry blank slate crowd and ultra-feminists, there are gender/sex differences!

I'm imagining women were more likely to respond positively to "want to go on a date?" than "drop your knickers right now".

EDIT: Also, both experiments were done around the start of the 80s, I wonder if they would have different outcomes today. And there was a lead-up to it:

In both experiments, five college women and four college men from an experimental social psychology class acted as confederates. They were instructed to stand in an area of the college campus and approach members of the opposite gender. They were instructed to only approach those that they found attractive and would be willing to actually sleep with (in any other scenario, presumably). When the confederates spotted someone they liked they said: “I have been noticing you around campus. I found you to be very attractive.” They then asked one of three different questions:

“Would you go out with me tonight?”

“Would you come over to my apartment tonight?”

“Would you go to bed with me tonight?

In total, 48 men and 48 women were asked these questions from a member of the opposite gender (i.e. 16 each question).

This is actually kinda fun, let's have a look at the results:

1978 -

Man approaches women, asks:

Date? Compliance: 56%

Apartment? Compliance: 6%

Bed? Compliance: 0%

Woman approaches men, asks:

Date? Compliance: 50%

Apartment? Compliance: 69%

Bed? Compliance: 75%

From which I take away men have no sense of self-preservation/see no reason to be afraid anything bad will happen to them if they head off to a strange place with a strange person, like waking up in a bath of ice missing their kidney or knocked out with a Mickey Finn and robbed, or, you know, end up raped and murdered.

1982 -

Man approaches women, asks:

Date? Compliance: 50%

Apartment? Compliance: 0%

Bed? Compliance: 0%

Woman approaches men, asks:

Date? Compliance: 50%

Apartment? Compliance: 69%

Bed? Compliance: 69%

It's like our (grand)mothers always told us, men only have one thing on their mind! 😁 Sorry to be judging the entire sex on a bunch of horny college boys, but gentlemen, you just want to go straight to dessert without eating your vegetables, as it were: no date, fuck now!

From which I take away men have no sense of self-preservation/see no reason to be afraid anything bad will happen to them if they head off to a strange place with a strange person, like waking up in a bath of ice missing their kidney or knocked out with a Mickey Finn and robbed, or, you know, end up raped and murdered.

Oh, we see it.

I think every simp that ever forked over money, every guy that walked down the alley only to be ambushed by her boyfriend...they all had an inkling.

It just didn't matter enough.