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PaperclipPerfector  8mo ago (text post)   3779 thread views

Small-Scale Question Sunday for August 27, 2023

Do you have a dumb question that you're kind of embarrassed to ask in the main thread? Is there something you're just not sure about?

This is your opportunity to ask questions. No question too simple or too silly.

Culture war topics are accepted, and proposals for a better intro post are appreciated.

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Are gay men actually gay?

What portion of gay men are completely uninterested in women? If there was a highly attractive women who wanted to have sex, what portion of gay men would say no?

Maybe it is my autistic inability to see things from other's perspective but I have a sneaking suspicion that many gay men are gay because grindr is tinder on tutorial mode. I can understand if some of them feel attraction to men but honestly if they had the ability to easily attract high quality women would they really say no?

I've often wondered a similar question: how many gay men are attracted to men but find the idea of having sex with men to be repulsive? Disgust at fecal matter and anything that's touched it or contains it (e.g., rectums) seem to be pretty instinctive and probably evolved because of its association with pathogens. By contrast, vaginas have evolved for penises and, more generally, evolved to be pretty clean despite contact with the external environment (e.g., extreme acidity to combat pathogens; permeable membranes to allow easy access for the woman's white blood cells; constant low-level flushing via cervical fluid, etc.)

I just see no reason to assume that attraction to men needs to come bundled with a desire to... do extremely unhygienic things that go against our instinctive disgust.

Does anyone know gay men who don't want to have sex with men?

I was talking about this with friends of mine awhile ago and had an amusing exchange.

Folamh3: You know it's weird, because people act like anal sex is totally unnatural. But no one thinks that oral sex is weird, even though the mouth didn't evolve to be a penis receptacle any more than the anus did. The vagina is the only orifice that actually evolved to be a penis receptacle.

Friend: What do you mean? Why not the anus?

Folamh3: Well, like, the anus isn't self-lubricating, for example.

Friend: Speak for yourself.

(He's straight and was joking, if it wasn't obvious.)

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