The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Sounds to me like you're hoping for your relationship to bestow status upon you which isn't happening because of her (apparent) low standards. Thus the need for verification that you're better than her past encounters. If she chose them and you, you must have something alike.
So the obvious prescriptions (pick your poison as appropriate to the details of the situation and what you can stomach):
a) get your status from something else, your relationship is something you extract resources from/trade with, not something you are proud of
b) realize that nobody else is going to know about her past, they'll just see you with this hot and successful gf. Doll her up and show her off.
c) convince yourself that her past encounters were actually high status. Get to know and respect her exes.
c) convince yourself that she has changed, made mistakes in the past, but now recognized her value. Help her find God/Self Confidence/her talents.
d) find someone choosier or more conventionally attractive.
I think I am above average status conscious, but I don't think this is a status thing. It's mostly my ego being bruised about what it means for her to be with me after those guys.
What is ego but your perception of your status? Oxford Dictionary: Ego: a person's sense of self-esteem or self-importance. Self Esteem: confidence in one's own worth or abilities. Self Importance: an exaggerated sense of one's own value or importance.
I think your response to 2rafa clearly shows it is a status thing, but it may be best to drop the status framing even if it is accurate because a lot of people lose the ability to cooperate when thinking directly about status. They can only see villains maneuvering and thus act that part. WalterODim and FiveHourMarathon have some great advice in my opinion, so if my model of relationships grinds with you I'd recommend trying out theirs.
Ego is your importance in your own eyes, status your importance in others'. Very closely related, but in this case importantly different; e.g. to successfully "realize that nobody else is going to know about her past" would solve status-based anxieties but not ego-based ones.
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