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Wellness Wednesday for March 13, 2024

The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:

  • Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.

  • Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.

  • Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.

  • Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).

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Something along those lines is common, in my experience. It's a bit discouraging, but the subset of people will get progressively interested in you gets progresively smaller.

Total people on the app > people who will see your profile > people who will like you > people who will actually respond > people who agree to a date > dates that actually happen

For a lot of people, online dating is nerve-wracking, leading to flakiness. And most people will prioritize other events or commitments above a first date with someone they've never met, leading to further flakiness.

Just stick with it. You're going to have to talk to a lot of people before you click with someone.