Do you have a dumb question that you're kind of embarrassed to ask in the main thread? Is there something you're just not sure about?
This is your opportunity to ask questions. No question too simple or too silly.
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Notes -
How can self worth not be a self defeating concept?
The human being is a social animal, and interacting with others is very important to them. A person's happiness, access to resources and even physical safety is determined by both their belonging to a group and their social position within that group. When a person feels that they have little worth and are downbad because of it, others around them will respond with platitudes such as "you need to improve your self worth" or "you to be confident!" Yet often, a person has low self worth or confidence because others assign low worth to them. This treatment need not come in the form outright abuse - if a person is repeatedly ignored or passed over then they end up attaining a low level of worth simply because they can see that others are recieving positive affirmations when they themselves are not.
Most things people do beyond fulfilling their immediate biological needs, such as eating and urinating, is to work to increase their social standing, which may happen immediately or over a long period of time. A person aware of their low worth must convince themselves into believing that if they perform certain actions they can accquire greater worth from the positive reinforcement provided by others. For example, that they dress in a way that will be more accepted by others, or that they act in a happy and upbeat manner even when they are not feeling so. A person must not act as though they have a high worth when this is not valued by others - you cannot for example go to a job interview and say that you are worth some 6 digit salary if this is transparently not the case. This is the fastest way to decrease the view of oneself in the eyes of others.
Hence, a person's motivations cannot ever concern themselves alone, unless you have the strength to withstand spending large parts of your life alone in very bad places. What good is prefixing self to worth if, for a healthy, adjusted human being, worth comes from places other than the self?
By feeling inadequate, some people start sending signals associated with low value, and other people pick up on these signals and assume that they're true. Other people don't know the real you, they only get what you show them. So the worth of a person is sort of a collective agreement, and every individual has some influence in what the conclusion is going to be. People who are more based/grounded in themselves, and more certain without external approval, will paradoxically get more positive external approval. Those who need it the most won't get it because they ask (and in extreme cases, beg). This is why fishing for compliments fail. Bragging fails too (we recognize that it's a desperate attempt for validation). Some people even give up getting a girlfriend, and then manage to get a girlfriend because they stopped looking desperate.
Real confidence comes from within. But it may be dangerous to have much more confidence than actual skill. There's also advantages to being pitied. Some people stay in the victim mentality basically forever, they're held to low standards, and other people rush to tell them how everything is going to be okay. This can be addicting, and taking responsibility for yourself requires throws away this advantage.
I think it's alright to evaluate people based on their character, but evaluating "worth" as how much productivity you can provide society seem like a consequence of the rat race. I don't think it's a healthy way to think since the priority is so disconnected from social life. And I can see the point with the idea that a king is only a king if other people believe that he is. So even if you're a great person, people around you might not have the judgement to realize it.
But the question you've asked is essentially about the nature of social hierarchies and coherence between living beings. A proper answer requires everything from psychology and neuroscience to game theory and complex systems. It too large to even put a dent in it, so I just shared a few interesting things which came to mind.
Edit: It's worth a mention that Jordan Peterson uploaded a video about Self-esteem not existing. It may be a poor concept better explained by other things. If you're interested the video ID is watch?v=9f3qyNNtpQk
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