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Several times now, I've had text conversations with women where they seem to scare themselves off.
One kept pushing me to ask her sexual compatibility questions, which I answered as delicately and dryly as I could. She'd rave excessively about how attractive I was and how she's looking forward to seeing me again (we met once, briefly, and she tracked me down on social). Since I know it's a bad idea to build up a date this much and set sexual implications, I complemented her back but kept it light and fun.
Then the day of the date, suddenly a co-worker got fired and she has to work a double. Also "You're not expecting sex for this meeting, are you?" Well no, I was not, despite everything you've said being suggestive of that, because I was going to take it slow. I reply "Light canoodling at most." There's mutual availability tuesday, and thursday, but she suggests thursday, mentioning "she'd like more planning, usually." Now I haven't heard anything from her since.
Before this, the shape of the exact same thing happened. She started talking as though she was already assuming we'd be in a relationship with her "adding spice to my life and shaking things up." This is way, WAY more than I'd typically send when I haven't even met someone in person, it assumes too much. Then suddenly she was astronomically ill from "allergies," which continued for several days, her apparently being home from work, yet replying less than when she was at work, until I stopped texting.
I want people to turn up for an in-person date. I very carefully don't say things that create too much pressure or assume things about compatibility, because it comes off as pressuring and dishonest ("OMG I'm so into you" ...we haven't actually met yet, miss, maybe save that for after the first date). But then they themselves do that exact thing, bail the day before.
Fucking everything I do is tiptoeing around not triggering anyone's anxiety so as not to be treated as a threat, then they trigger their OWN anxieties, treat me like a threat, and presumably pat themselves on the back for having spotted a manipulative predator who was Only After One Thing.
What the fuck is going on here?
When I interact with someone in real life, I get really confused and anxious whenever they start praising me. Then they get confused as to why. This is why. Because whenever someone gives me unprompted compliments or raves about me, they swiftly ditch me, which is why I don't believe what anyone says anymore.
Which app are you on where this keeps happening? I've used the apps before and, as I said below, I haven't had any problems remotely similar to what you describe. I've had women cancel dates at the last minute before, but they've always rescheduled and gone off eventually. And what are the rest of the conversations about? If you're keeping it to normal topics like sports, hobbies, politics, movies, music, etc. and she suddenly shifts it to how good looking you are and how she wants to fuck you, I can understand why you'd want to stick with it, but if the entire conversation is nothing but flirty banter then you should seriously question whether the woman is worth pursuing.
I'd recommend sticking to educated women with good professional jobs who are looking for long-term relationships and whose profiles are reasonably filled out and suggest that they already have rich, fulfilling lives without you around. These women tend to be much more stable than the hairdressers and retail clerks of the world who lead crappy, uninteresting lives, have no discernable hobbies or interests, and are looking for a guy for sex, or validation, or because they don't otherwise have a social life. I wouldn't even mention sex in a conversation until it's reached a certain stage, i.e. home plate.
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