The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
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Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
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I'll know in a bit. She's out at the moment.
She's been very resistant to any sort of help. She's refused to speak to our pastor either alone or with me and has refused all suggestions of counseling, therapy or psychiatry. I've been speaking with our pastor regularly in person in addition to frequent texts and emails.
Speaking to her nurse practitioner today, the NP recommended taking her to the walk in psychiatric service at our hospital. I anticipate she'll refuse.
If she persists in the delusion that she's been speaking to Elon Musk after being advised of the scam, I thought I'd see if our local PD would assist in having her sectioned. I've already left a message with the detective regarding the scam.
Ok, are you in the UK or the US? If the UK, you might be able to enlist the help of the local adult social care department as a halfway house between psychiatric treatment and therapy. We used to offer just chat sessions to people suffering stress et al. But disconnecting even from a trusted pastor sounds worrying, so social services may not be an option either as that will need voluntary engagement.
Is there a trusted family member of hers who might be able to get through to her? If it were my wife, I'd be going to her brother and her cousin she is very close with for example. Not quite an intervention perhaps, but a display that multiple people she trusts are worried.
Having said that, you know the situation better than me, but I have seen spouses sectioning their sick wives/husbands result in the end of the marriage multiple times, so just make sure to think through your options. This is a legitimately tough thing to go through so make sure you are also looking after your own health. If you're engaged with your pastor at least you have some kind of outlet.
Good luck seems inadequate, but I will wish it anyway.
US.
After confronting her with the email and the screenshots of the transactions she agreed to go to a crisis counseling walk in service. They saw us right away, she was much more amenable to seeing a therapist / psychiatrist after talking through things with the crisis counselor. She goes back tomorrow.
I'd reached out to her brother several weeks ago. Unfortunately they were estranged when we ment and married. Didn't really reconcile until ~14 years ago, and we've only seen him in person once in the last 12 years.
I was really very surprised how supportive and engaged the local police department was when I reached out about options, thankfully I did not need to go down that path. Small town life.
She now says she knew it was a scam and sent the money anyway because they were nice to her and it was part fantasy. Though the money and bitcoin was very real and not fantasy.
I've a friend who's a psychiatrist in the UK. He and my wife did A&E rotations together in Ireland. He and I are talking tomorrow.
I really appreciate your advice, thank you.
Well being willing to get help is at least a positive sign. And knowing it was a scam but treating it as a kind of escapist fantasy a la a new sports car seems maybe better than being delusional, hopefully. Still not great financially though of course.
I'll hope the help she is able to get is effective and this is a short term issue fueled by depression and the like. I don't think I have anything more from a technical side so just hope and good wishes.
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