This weekly roundup thread is intended for all culture war posts. 'Culture war' is vaguely defined, but it basically means controversial issues that fall along set tribal lines. Arguments over culture war issues generate a lot of heat and little light, and few deeply entrenched people ever change their minds. This thread is for voicing opinions and analyzing the state of the discussion while trying to optimize for light over heat.
Optimistically, we think that engaging with people you disagree with is worth your time, and so is being nice! Pessimistically, there are many dynamics that can lead discussions on Culture War topics to become unproductive. There's a human tendency to divide along tribal lines, praising your ingroup and vilifying your outgroup - and if you think you find it easy to criticize your ingroup, then it may be that your outgroup is not who you think it is. Extremists with opposing positions can feed off each other, highlighting each other's worst points to justify their own angry rhetoric, which becomes in turn a new example of bad behavior for the other side to highlight.
We would like to avoid these negative dynamics. Accordingly, we ask that you do not use this thread for waging the Culture War. Examples of waging the Culture War:
-
Shaming.
-
Attempting to 'build consensus' or enforce ideological conformity.
-
Making sweeping generalizations to vilify a group you dislike.
-
Recruiting for a cause.
-
Posting links that could be summarized as 'Boo outgroup!' Basically, if your content is 'Can you believe what Those People did this week?' then you should either refrain from posting, or do some very patient work to contextualize and/or steel-man the relevant viewpoint.
In general, you should argue to understand, not to win. This thread is not territory to be claimed by one group or another; indeed, the aim is to have many different viewpoints represented here. Thus, we also ask that you follow some guidelines:
-
Speak plainly. Avoid sarcasm and mockery. When disagreeing with someone, state your objections explicitly.
-
Be as precise and charitable as you can. Don't paraphrase unflatteringly.
-
Don't imply that someone said something they did not say, even if you think it follows from what they said.
-
Write like everyone is reading and you want them to be included in the discussion.
On an ad hoc basis, the mods will try to compile a list of the best posts/comments from the previous week, posted in Quality Contribution threads and archived at /r/TheThread. You may nominate a comment for this list by clicking on 'report' at the bottom of the post and typing 'Actually a quality contribution' as the report reason.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Notes -
Screen time. Same argument as with dating. I don't think we need to overthink this. As people have more options to spend their free time on, they will most likely pick activities with least friction. Without looking at data, I'm sure invention of TV started contributing to this as well. But nothing compares to having instant access of a dopamine hit that every single one of us has in our pocket. No wonder some can't even resist it while driving. Not to mention how superior of an experience it is to discuss certain things online versus in person. You're typing this out on an obscure forum instead of discussing it with the boys.
Modern (speaking about American specifically) infrastructure is so badly designed for connecting with people. Most people live in the suburbs. That means it's likely a 30+ minute car ride to meet with a friend. 60 minutes all in just for commute to meet with someone. That completely eliminates spontaneous meetups, that's why every get together is a 1 month in advance thing these days. This connects back to screen time, most people are just choosing the path of least resistance - being glued to a screen at home.
There's no third spaces. People don't drink anymore, so bars and clubs are out. What else is there? New thing is running clubs I guess.
Beg your pardon? I think alcohol sales are down roughly 2-3% from a few years ago, but people certainly still fill up all the good bars in any major city on the weekends, at minimum.
More options
Context Copy link
I think friend groups in a lot of places I've lived in also struggle with suburban sprawl making it hard to buy houses in similar suburbs. When I was living in Melbourne, Australia it was essentially people just hoping for anything at a reasonable price within an hour's commute of the CBD but radiating out in all directions from the CBD. Keeping a friend group together in your thirties when one of you buys a townhouse 30 minutes west of the CBD and another one buys a townhouse 40 minutes East of the CBD
More options
Context Copy link
This implies that you don't have any friends in the suburb you're living in. Is that considered usual in the US?
I doubt there's data on this, but I'd say it's pretty common. It's unlikely your existing friends end up living in the exact same suburb as you and you really gotta go out of your way to make friends with your neighbors, who will most likely be older than you (median age of a homebuyer in the US is 59). A 30 minute drive is literally nothing in the US though. It takes approximately 12-15 minutes to just get out of my suburb without traffic.
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link