The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
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Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
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Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
Jump in the discussion.
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Notes -
The capstone marriage vs. the cornerstone marriage, as I have heard it. Do you only get into relationships as a reward for putting in the hard work of becoming a person worthy of a relationship, or is the relationship the firm foundation the rest of your life is built on?
If you both view the relationship as "the firm foundation the rest of your life is built on" and you are both committed to giving 100% to each other regardless of if it feels like you are getting 100% back (because sometimes one person's 100% only feels like 50% to the other person), then you will be fine. If that level of commitment is the thing you are hoping changes, then run away screaming.
So using your definition of a capstone marriage, that definitely isn't my view, I firmly believe that relationship should be the bedrock the rest of your life is built on. And I actually am 100% certain that she is someone who will give me 100% commitment to the relationship.
I think the issues I'm having now is more about wondering if she is someone, who at her baseline, is someone who is compatable with me. The kinds of issues we are now dealing with feel more fundamental about ourselves.
Stuff about how we communicate our feelings and issues, how we like to interact in social settings, etc.
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