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I've had the experience of excluding someone like this before from a neutral space. People in leadership need to bite the bullet and understand that threats never de-escalate themselves.
And to a volunteer organization anything in the form of "I am unhappy, therefore you should do more work to make me happy" is a threat. It can overwhelm the amount of work people are willing to take on for the organization.
I'd they respond with hostility to some formulation of "I'd like to keep you happy how about you work with me to appease your concerns" then fuck them.
Progressives have the language and understanding of this concept. They just also sometimes have a magical belief in the value of certain peoples.
Adeptness in excluding the awful parts of humanity is part of the game. And the skilled progressives play it just fine. It's the people that can't even run off to clown college that get left holding the bag.
I mean sure you can work around them, but you're still at peril of likeminded people reaching a certain critical mass and/or making a bad play then you're forever trapped into the Ableism Prison. Also good faith operations are going to be more vulnerable to this due to a certain naivety from the people operating them.
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I don't have much else to add here outside affirmation that this is indeed its own special kind of hell, and noting that this kind of behavior is in the Simple Sabotage Field Manual for a reason.
And hence one of the objectives of management is to make sure that magical belief is placed in the value of the peoples working for the organization. If they can't, then they must be excluded.
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