The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
-
Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
-
Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
-
Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
-
Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Notes -
What is the point of money to you? It seems like you view money as a terminal goal, instead of a representation of the trade of value/effort between people, which you can then employ in your own goals by exchanging for other people's efforts.
What goals are you working towards achieving right now? If you don't have any, the first goal should be to find that "hobby that builds you." You need to build yourself up to actually find good things desirable and worth pursuing. Money is not desirable or worth pursuing for it's own sake - it is worth pursuing as an intermediary step for other goals.
I grew up in a family that was transitioning from lower class to upper middle class, so I got to experience both the bad times and the good times. And then my experiences got reinforced by the comparison of my family's [new upper middle class] life and lives of all of my lower class friends. Visiting a friend and seeing how his parents sleep in the living room, and him sharing a tiny bedroom the size of my closet with his sister and having to do homework on the kitchen table, then going back home to my own room the size of half his apartment, with my own desk, left a very strong impression on me. So for the longest time, I've treated money as an ultimate goal because having no money leads to a plethora of issues I don't want to deal with. And aside from that, I think the fact that money is such a simple indicator of whether you're winning or losing has always been appealing to me. Other parts of life are a lot more complex and winning conditions are not as clearly defined.
High level goals: 2-3x current net worth, find something I enjoy doing without monetary reward (or at least with monetary reward not being the main aspect), and have a family before I turn 35.
I'm very aware of my issues, when I was a lot younger I was even more money focused. A simple hangout with friends would throw me into an opportunity cost calculation and whether I'd learn anything useful from spending time with them vs sitting alone in my room focusing on my business. I don't know if it was a defense mechanism from my social anxiety that would just try to come up with any and all excuses to not socialize or if it was my actual way of thinking, but it wasn't a good mindset. I'm significantly better than this now. I don't mind spending money on experiences or on friends these days.
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link