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Notes -
A question: why do people believe that people - especially men - who are unsuccessful with romantic relationships are unsuccessful because of a lack of moral virtue? A man who's 30 years old and has never gone on a date or kissed anyone is assumed by default to be some kind of fat, basement-dwelling loser. When he is in fact a short but fit engineer, or a corporate lawyer, or a programmer for Google, he's then roundly criticized for being misogynistic or lacking in moral virtue. Occasionally, darker - much darker - suspicions are raised: let's say that there are reasons why these men frequently avoid being around unrelated children. It seems difficult for people to comprehend that an apparently healthy, gainfully-employed individual could fail to meet with romantic success despite a decade of trying...unless there is something seriously morally wrong with them.
Someone who fails at being a salesman, or a business owner, or even at playing basketball worth a damn...doesn't get that. "I'm a nice, decent, hardworking guy...but I can't sell shoes at Nordstrom, I've been working hard to do this and have dreamt of being a salesman since I was 12" is a kind of absurd complaint. He might be a fine human being and maybe he'd make a great heavy equipment operator, but he just doesn't have the talent for sales. We don't think there's something morally wrong with our hero because he can't sell shoes, or because he's a short, clumsy guy that sucks at basketball.
Meh, that's mere technical knowledge. People expect them to require specialization or for some people to be more talented.
Meanwhile, social skills are seen to go together. If you seem utterly incompetent at an important life project like that people will wonder where else in the social world that also applies.
Hmm. That is interesting. Hell: someone who hasn't learned to drive and appears healthy...maybe he's just a lazy bum, but he might well have some kind of invisible disability. So too: if I had to guess, if you put a gun to my head? People with poor social skills AND who are also pieces of shit tend not to last that long in a given environment. Successful predatory shitbaggery requires the ability to conceal it at least some of the time and as such not suck donkey balls socially. Yes, you have the shit tier self-identified incels...but they're also lonely people. The Harvey Weinsteins of the world are competent at being predatory pieces of shit. It's basically Berkson's paradox.
Well, that's true for me. I let 2 learners lapse because I was too busy/lazy to give the exam.
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