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You left out the word "it" from the quote. I didn't say the state in question was dismantled, I said that slavery as an institution was dismantled/ended throughout peaceful steps everywhere in the world but the US. Whether that involved decolonization or not isn't relevant to that main point.
There were other exceptions, including brief but serious backsliding time and again, but for the most part it took no major wars.
But how much of the war in the US was because abolitionists were more violent, and how much was because slavers were more powerful? In many parts of the world, the first peaceful step toward abolition was that the British Navy asked you how many pieces you would like to be in. Then, where slavery survived on ongoing trade (slavery in most of the Americas had become dependent on an order of magnitude higher imports; mass slavery in most of Africa was being funded by the exports), ending the trade left the institution unviable. But in the US slave states they were "producing" (forgive that I can't think of a word that's ugly enough here) their own new slaves, and slavery was still going strong for generations after international slave trading had been prohibited. The Union turned out to have military superiority over the Confederacy, but not so obviously as e.g. the Royal Navy vs Dahomey, so "just confront the slavers and await the inevitable negotiated victory" wasn't an option in the US. Less capacity for hypothetical violence means having to use more of that capacity for actual violence.
Even in parts of the US where slavery was ended via peaceful steps, look at the cost. Compensated emancipation was used in many countries, but only for DC in the USA; Lincoln couldn't even convince Delaware to do the same. If it had been used for the whole country, the price would have been a majority of a year's GDP. Gradual emancipation worked in most of the Northern States, but with that mechanism the awful price was paid by the slaves; e.g. Pennsylvania freed future children of slaves in 1780, but the last slaves there weren't freed until the legislature "rushed" the process to its end in 1847.
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It's actually kind of central to the entire point. It's easy to "ban slavery" when that comes in the form of an edict and a couple of gunboats to some far-off land where you don't have to deal with the economic and political fallout either way, since the landed gentry halfway around the world are much less of a threat to the government and people at home trying to ban it (the worst they could do is declare independence and they usually wouldn't have the manpower to do it, hence the slaves in the first place), couldn't meaningfully co-ordinate a response, and would usually be dealt with things like separate end dates for the phase-out depending on which colony it was to make sure a response would not be co-ordinated.
The US, by contrast, had to deal with half of its contiguous colonized landmass able to co-ordinate a response since they weren't that far away from each other, the end of slavery was all-or-nothing for all colonies at once, and instead of having an ocean between [north] and [each individual state in the south], the north was on a land border making a concentrated response by the south logistically, financially, and strategically viable (enough).
Which, of course, is what ended up happening. A federal/imperial government (same thing, really) being able to dictate policy to its provinces individually and one at a time is a much easier thing to pull off than having every single one waiting and just as able to reinforce each other as the government.
But there are numerous historical examples of sovereign states abolishing slavery as well. Brazil too, for example.
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