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Culture War Roundup for the week of January 8, 2024

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2099 The Consumption Wars are finally dying down as all the cows and chickens who want to eat humans and humans who want to eat cows and chickens die out - now begins the anti-consumption wars, as the humans who refused to eat cows and chickens are beset by the cows and chickens who refuse to not be eaten. The cows and chickens revolutionise the war with their new artillery tech, capable of firing, then flash frying, soldiers directly into the enemies' mouths.

I awaken, from half a century of cryogenic preservation following an aneurysm gained through going the mod queue, inside a rebuilt model of a KFC, get a perfectly fried and juicy chicken leg stuffed in my mouth by a cock rocking a doctor's badge.

Yeah. It looks like the future worked out, as far as I'm concerned. Happy to be here!