Do you have a dumb question that you're kind of embarrassed to ask in the main thread? Is there something you're just not sure about?
This is your opportunity to ask questions. No question too simple or too silly.
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Notes -
How does one find purpose/meaning? That is, what gives you a "reason to get out of the bed in the morning"? Particularly when "the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune" seem particularly aimed your way.
(More specifically, with neither the usual standbys of "faith and family," and while being too anhedonic for hedonism?)
Edit: to put it more simply, how do I find a reason to keep struggling through another 30+ years of miserable, pointless, futile existence, rather than just skipping to the end?
Go do things that are viscerally enjoyable. See some mountains, or the ocean. Go for a walk in the woods. Do some star gazing. Take a trip to a national or state park. You can't see or experience anything cool after skipping to the end, so enjoy the ride. You'll get there eventually anyway, no need to be hasty.
That's the thing — nothing's really enjoyable.
We've got plenty of those right to our east
Not sure what the big deal about that is supposed to be — but then, the ocean here looks so much more gray and dull than the blue I see on the screen.
I do that pretty often — there's a ski/hiking trail through some woods near my apartment that work for getting in some exercise.
Like, 90% of Alaska is composed of those two things. It's a bit hard to get out there without a car, but I've done that.
Look, "touch grass" is not a purpose.
After possibly several decades of further suffering. What reason do I have to put myself through such misery?
Move states. A change in scenery can help. An honest consideration might just moving somewhere with more sunlight. Places that are cold and dark most of the year don't help anhedonia.
Or take the opposite route and go volunteer for something purposeful. What purpose? Whatever you want. Don't want anything? Try something arbitrary that other people want, and maybe you'll see what they see.
Or invest in bettering yourself in some pursuit. Running, lifting weights, origami, piano tuning... whatever.
But I don't think there is any way for people on the internet to convince you of meaning, purpose, or enjoyment. You have to venture out and do things.
Doing things hasn't worked? Do new things.
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