Mottizen
10mo ago
I think a lot of this stuff is difficult to parse in terms of masculine notions of consent and sexuality. It's a lot more binary and individual agency driven.
I've dated a lot, I've got a bunch of close girl friends who date a lot and a lot of women just have this desire to be 'swept along' in the tide of relationships plus intense binary bipolar takes on previous relationships. Guys don't 'ick' like women do, for the most part, negative information discovered will be more filed under 'she is a 7 with an asterisks due to XYZ' whilst most heterosexual women are very 100-0 in how they see men.
Also add weird cultural norms on top of that. I've had girlfriends who simply refuse to discuss/initiate sex in any sort of an agency-driven way. The closest they'll come is acting in a way that 'makes them exposed to being acted upon'. This is due to a combination of weird shame-driven consciousness around it, plus ego. Women don't deal well with outright rejection as a rule of thumb, since their conception of sex is 'I am the gatekeeper and at any time the rapacious male presence will go through there'. If they open the proverbial gate and the rapacious hordes shrug and defer from entering, egodeath ensues.
Even that's a matter of degree.
My dad was born in a society where light spousal abuse was prettymuch accepted (and went both ways to be frank), but also if somebody was judged by the community as going too far they'd be shunned/sorted out. Which was an arbitrary line, but tended to be how things were self-policed by the community especially living in densely-packed tenements where everything'd be more-or-less public.
Slapping your husband for coming home from the pub at 2AM was fine by community standards. Leaving notable bruises or doing actual damage was frowned upon.
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