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4mo ago
New Year's resolutions? Do you make them? Do you keep them?
This year, I am thinking of the following priorities:
- Work hard(er). Get into the habit of hard work.
- Continue to meet new people, and maintain existing relationships
I came across The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, and I agree with all of them but "I wish I hadn't worked so hard." I actually wish I was working harder and really would like to maintain a consistent daily work habit. I managed this a couple of month this year but it dropped off at the start of October. I should probably read Atomic Habits even though I feel like I will know most of it.
I have more ideas floating in my head but I won't set them as goals just yet. I should tidy up and publish a crappy project I have, just to get it out there. I should release more work in general, or build in public. I want to perform in front of an audience. I should figure out how to leverage the internet to make friends online. I should get into climbing. I want to go on a solo trip somewhere. These are more specific and I might pick some of these later to focus on, but I know for sure those two priorities above define the general direction I want to go.
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4mo ago
it'd be better to let "cancelling" be done by the state, because then people can defend themselves and a court can decide if they're truly guilty of the offense.
It depends on the laws, eh? If memes are illegal, and you posted memes in a private WhatsApp group, then you're going to prison.
From a consequentialist perspective... I would rather have the First Amendment than the Communications Act 2003, which makes it illegal to send anything "grossly offensive" over electronic communications, even if no one actually sees it or is offended by it.
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4mo ago
My feeling is that most kids' time is unstructured and not very valuable for learning. So if the choice is between an intensive chess program and the status quo, the chess program is a pareto improvement. If the choice is between an intensive chess program and an intensive Spanish program, then sure, there are trade offs. But most kids would otherwise be watching youtube videos or playing minecraft.
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4mo ago
I feel you and @f3zinker
I'm single and work remote. But I was actually NEET for a long time and my current situation feels so much better. While NEET I was so embarrassed I would dread meeting people in case they asked what I did for a living, which made the social isolation much worse. Every week as a NEET is a week down the drain. Now my bank account grows at the end of each month, my YoE grows, and I'll eventually get promoted without doing anything in particular.
This year I have made new friends. The more friends you have, the easier it is to meet people. It's an exponential relationship. But an exponential stays pretty flat for a while before it takes off, so you have to bear through the flat stage. I think you just have to pick something and just keep turning up. I go to tech meetups. I've got to know the regulars. There was a nerdy music gig a while ago, I asked a couple of them if they were interested and we went together. It was a success. There's another gig coming up and now more people are interested. At this stage it feels like I've got a growing group of people I know, with shared interests, that I can do certain social things with. At the very least, I know when I go a monthly meet up, I will see some friendly familiar faces and we can catch up. It did take about a year to get here.
I don't meet many women like this, it's true. But it does feel nice to have a semblance of a social life. I have pictures of me doing things for the dating apps, I have things to talk about on dates, and am slowing becoming a more interesting and datable person.
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5mo ago
no we aren’t going to give food away, there is just going to be abundant food that’s so cheap that nobody can’t afford it.
This is already the case, but now everyone complains about food waste. Can't win!
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5mo ago
I can believe that doctors average 130 IQ (though it seems a little high), and I totally expect that IQ correlates with performance.
Maths is far more g loaded than medicine. People who study maths will talk about eventually hitting a wall and no longer being able to progress. At a certain level you no longer have the cognitive power to comprehend the ideas.
I've never heard anyone talk in such a way about medicine. In medicine it seems like there is not much to "understand". Is it possible to get stuck on a question in medicine and not understand the answer? My impression is no. Are there 10x or 100x doctors? Doctors who can do things the average doctor can't?
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5mo ago
Can you share one that you struggled with? I'm wondering how I'd fare. I'm very much the opposite with weak verbal skills.
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5mo ago
Back to medicine, as long as I have pharmaceutically enhanced diligence, I've yet to run into anything I simply can't understand, and I think I do a decent enough job at it.
Medicine is not massively g-loaded, is it? It's mostly memorisation, hence the popular med school anki subreddit. I can't think of anything day-to-day that actually requires reasoning about. I think it's why doctors suck at thinking from first principles and shut down when you ask them about something outside their "training set".
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5mo ago
I don't know yet, a friend just reached out so it's very early. I expect salary to be revealed after a successful interview, but I will ask for a range.
I don't expect it to be that much higher, which is why I'm wondering, all things equal, if I should switch. Of course a much higher salary makes it an easy decision.
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5mo ago
Software career advice- I'm a junior React dev in the UK at a "local" 50 person company. I was approached and may be able to get a similar job at a large multinational (AutoDesk). On average, is it better to work for an American multinational? I'm pretty comfortable where I am, and it's not great timing to jump ship as I'm quite sure I will get promoted in 2-3 months, though I might be able to use an offer to negotiate an immediate promotion. I presume AutoDesk is a step up in the trimodal nature of software jobs. But am I missing something? It is an obviously easy decision to leave to work for a billion dollar company? Is it a big boon to my CV?
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5mo ago
Okay, you didn't pick yourself, but you're going to spend the rest of your life with yourself, so you might as well treat yourself right and be your own cheerleader. It is not being "honest" to be hyper-critical and beat yourself up all the time. It is not useful. It is a self-reinforcing bad habit. It is a cognitive distortion. It is a trapped prior. But there are other ways of being that are just as honest but far more energizing.
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5mo ago
Indifference isn't always a "healthy" response, but it can be. Every situation is different and there are many good and bad ways to think about each one.
Now instead of thinking about whatever bad event set me off, I'm thinking about how stupid and irrational and unhealthy and undisciplined I am for engaging in negative self-talk.
I was going to mention this but didn't want to make things too complicated. You are allowed to have the negative self talk, but then you have to practice the rephrasing even if you don't feel it. Would you talk to your friend like that? How would you think about things if it was your friend and not you? And actually think it "out loud".
On negativity - I argue negativity is unhealthy. I know what you mean, it's no good thinking everything is great when it's not, but you can still maintain good vibes while acknowledging and fixing mistakes.
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5mo ago
This is a lot of words and all quite complicated. In my experience it is a "simple" habit modification.
You have an established habit of negative self talk that has become second nature.
I'm running late for the dentist. Why am I so useless at everything?
The first step is to just become more aware of this reflex.
I'm running late for the dentist. Why am I so useless at everything? Oh, there's the negative self-talk reflex.
Once you are aware of it, you can practice reframing or rephrasing, and talk to yourself like you would a friend.
I'm running late for the dentist. Why am I so useless at everything? Oh that's negative self talk. Actually it's no big deal. People are sometimes late for things and I was busy with work.
And then you can stop yourself as you have the negative response
I'm running late for the dentist. Why am I so -- actually it's not a big deal. I'm good.
And then you just jump to the healthy response
I'm running late for the dentist. It's no big deal. Can't wait to get dinner afterwards.
Each step is building a habit, and like any habit requires a bit of effort and mindfulness to start with, but gets easier with time. It shouldn't take years, probably closer to a week or two for each stage. I probably isn't Nick Cammarata MDMA-fuelled self love, but is a good way of getting you out of these automatic negative thought patterns.
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5mo ago
Hmm you could build this today. AI categorization for every chat message. Opt out of notifications for jokes and low-effort.
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5mo ago
Usually parents have autonomy over their children's treatment. If doctors believe that the parents are acting massively against their child's best interest, then they'll take it to the courts. This is because under law the doctors have a duty of care for the child, otherwise the doctors would be deemed negligent. So here it is a case of doctors vs parents.
In these case, the court will act in the child's best interest. So here, you might think paradoxically, the best interest is to withdraw care and allow the child to die. Modern medical technology can prolong death and make it a long and painful process. See Scott's blog for more on this.
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5mo ago
Personally, I'd move into management.
What exactly don't you like about your job? Is it the actual work, the company culture, the commute, the lack of "meaning", or something else? Each of these has a different solution.
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5mo ago
Hire a personal assistant to do all your life admin tasks. Hire a chef, or spend money such that you don't have to cook.
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5mo ago
There were a couple posts on Lesswrong about "optimal exercise" that you might like. This update, and the original one it links to.
WRT resistance training, I don't pursue any of the powerlifts (squat, bench, deadlift) anymore, instead focusing on other exercises that don't load the spine/knees as much but allow you to load the requisite musculature easily. Weighted step ups instead of squats can be loaded quite heavy. Hyperextensions, one-legged hypers, and reverse hyperextensions can work the posterior chain with 1/2-1/3 the load on the spine as deadlifts. Bench doesn't exactly load the spine but it is the most dangerous lift going by statistics (dropping the weight on yourself is the most common severe gym accident) and can be replaced with incline bench, dumbbell shoulder presses, and/or dips. These exercises are substantially easier to cue people on in a single session.
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5mo ago
You don't have to answer these, but
- Why do you let clients demand things like that? Can't you clearly define deadlines and turn around times upfront? Make them pay rush fees if they really need to?
- Why when others have plans, are you expected to do the work? Is this reciprocal? Can't you make "fake" plans and stand firm?
- Why do you work after work hours? Do other people do this? Is it part of the industry or is it just you?
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6mo ago
This is just normie thinking. Motivated reasoning, confirmation bias, moving the goal posts, generally incoherent. The "reasoning" is a veneer. The conclusions are foregone. Analysis or steelmaning of the object-level is not worthwhile.
MR X: The trouble with Jews is that they only take care of their own group.
MR Y: But the record of the community chest shows that they give more generously than non-Jews.
MR X: That shows that they are always trying to buy favour and intrude in Christian affairs. They think of nothing but money; that’s why there are so many Jewish bankers.
MR Y: But a recent study shows that the per cent of Jews in banking is proportionally much smaller than the per cent of non-Jews.
MR X: That’s it. They don’t go for respectable businesses. They would rather run nightclubs.
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6mo ago
A police probe has been opened, as is "normal procedure", but yes, no mention of the offending player.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-nottinghamshire-67261168
It's a nice checkpoint to consider the last year and strategize about the next.
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