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Friday Fun Thread for May 23, 2025

Be advised: this thread is not for serious in-depth discussion of weighty topics (we have a link for that), this thread is not for anything Culture War related. This thread is for Fun. You got jokes? Share 'em. You got silly questions? Ask 'em.

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Why are Substack comments universally so stupid and so worshipful? Where do these ball-washers hide out all the time? It might be the worst comment section on the internet, I just don't know where these people come from. I mostly read substacks that are from weird, pseudo-hyper-masc, heterodox writers; and then the comments are all "WOW DUDE WHAT AN AMAZING ARTICLE IT'S ALMOST AS GOOD AS YOUR LAST ARTICLE!"

Maybe I'm just used to here where the comment that starts out "great post" normally moves on to "In paragraph three I think that you misphrased the way Churchill thought..."

But like, is everyone paying for fake AI comments? Is there just a vast reserve of ball-washers on the internet? Are these guys just Soundcloud-tier substack writers hoping that if they're positive about a popular writer someone will notice them?

I haven't really noticed that. Most of the time I just see a complete lack of comments. I think the writers are pained by that. I see some of them on discord and x, subtly or not subtly longing for more engagement. It could be that some of them go the route of paying for engagement in the same way that e.g. a restaurant can pay for fake reviews. I assume they probably figure that 'it'll get the show started, and then the real organic engagement starts and snowballs!'

Honestly, I've never posted a reply on substack as far as I can remember, but I was considering doing it one of these days, and I was gonna just straight up praise and gush... I'd be one of the ball-washers you describe. Because the blog in question is a very very good one. When I see strongly coherent and inspiring writing that speaks to me from start to finish, I'm genuinely impressed. Because it's pretty rare and not that easy to accomplish. It takes time and practice and skill to consistently write well. And to do it for several pages on end? Takes energy and commitment too.

I've never been good at writing long texts myself. I didn't really learn how to do it in school, and didn't have a supportive home environment to cultivate skills. Despite being a pretty good wordcel by nature (at least the receptive/decoding part), I wrote as little as I could get away with in school for various reasons: bad teachers, depression and anxiety, difficulty with identifying and putting feelings and thoughts into words because of alexithymia and low confidence, and so on. When I had to do it in university it was a pain and a stressful chore on which to procrastinate and agonize. It still doesn't come naturally. There's probably some critical/sensitive zones involved in the developmental psychology of a good writer. Then there's the part of self-construal: do you believe others have any interest and approval of what you might write? Would it be 'legit' in front of a public audience, etc.

Perhaps I'm not the only one who's secretly a bit worshipful of the people who quickly produce great texts without straining the shit out of their brain muscles, somewhat like how a tech-illiterate might ooh and aah at the wizardry when you press ctrl+alt+del and shut down a frozen task, heh.

You write quite well, though.

Thanks. Maybe I should practice more and see if I can speed up the process of articulation. Communication is kinda important, after all...