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Culture War Roundup for the week of August 11, 2025

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Courtesy
One of the most difficult parts about communities is that it is very easy for them to turn into a pit of toxicity. People who see toxic behavior in a community will follow that cue with their own toxic behavior, and this can quickly spiral out of control. This is bad for most communities, but would be an absolute death sentence for ours - it's impossible to discuss sensitive matters in an environment full of flaming and personal attacks. Therefore, this set of community rules are intended to address this preemptively.

Be Kind
People tend to overestimate offense aimed at them, while underestimating offense aimed at others; relying on "treat people like they treat you" turns conversations into flame wars. We ask that people be kind, under all circumstances, even if you think the other person is being mean. Please remember that you can always drop out of a conversation, ideally (though not necessarily) with an explanation; if a user follows you and harasses you, report them.

Be no more antagonistic than is absolutely necessary for your argument.
Some of the things we discuss are controversial, and even stating a controversial belief can antagonize people. That's OK, you can't avoid that, but try to phrase it in the least antagonistic manner possible. If a reasonable reader would find something antagonistic, and it could have been phrased in a way that preserves the core meaning but dramatically reduces the antagonism, then it probably should have been phrased differently.

Don't be egregiously obnoxious
No matter how careful we are, someone's going to come up with a way to be annoying, in a way that technically follows the rules. If we were to write a rule saying "don't do this thing", they would bend the rule to be as broad as possible, then complain that we're not enforcing it properly. The goal of this community is not, however, slavish adherence to rules. It's discussion. And if this means we need to use our human judgement to make calls, then that's exactly what we will do.

Compare and contrast:

lmao, epic roommate-mogging.

Do you have to listen to her moaning when he’s taking her to poundtown in your apartment? If I had a roommate, I’d be looking into lease-breaking options before subjecting myself to potentially seeing a crush, even a mild one, walk into a roommate’s room—much less listening to her moaning when it’s her turn out of his soft harem to get railed, at which point the recently discussed option of assisted suicide would rise in temptation.

Maybe he could kindly grab a PoV cellphone sex tape with her for you. It might break her spell on you, cure your crush on her, for you to see her Wonderfulness get defiled. On the other hand, it could also skyrocket your seethe and jealousy.

My assessment is that you are intentionally aiming to be as inflammatory as possible to another commenter with the above, perhaps in an attempt to "teach a lesson" to someone you disagree with. Your post appears to me to be well outside the sort of discussion we aim to foster here.

Your record is four warnings and three AAQCs, and no warnings this year and the last two notes being AAQCs. If this were the usual line-toeing, you would get a warning, but as it stands you are getting a three-day ban. Your record shows that you have a fairly good understanding of where the line is, so I am not buying the scenario where the above is anything other than a willful choice. If you decide to make a habit of this sort of comment, you can expect further bans to escalate rapidly.

My assessment is that you are intentionally aiming to be as inflammatory as possible to another commenter with the above, perhaps in an attempt to "teach a lesson" to someone you disagree with.

??? I think it's because Sloot didn't want to be castrated, or be 'erased from the gene pool' for the crime of not living up to his full potential or fucking girls @thejdizzler pines for. Which aside from being petty and mean is quite a hardline policy, let's face it.

I recognize that it's a pretty hardline policy. I'm throwing it out as a potential solution to the Lothario problem because every other solution other than "bootstraps" I see as equally outlandish in today's political climate.

I really shouldn't have stated that I was interested in the girl at all, or done any introspection and admitted I was slightly jealous of the guy. Like at @faceh has stated before, even trying to discuss this gets you labeled as an incel.

Yup.

Its not so much a complaint that the playing field isn't level or fair, "Wahhhh Mommm they aren't sharing the pussy, make them share!"

Its objecting to playing the game this way at all because its making everything worse for everyone involved. Either crack down on the people who are making it suck so much... or make everyone play a different, friendlier, more fun game.

But both complaints read like you're sexually unsuccessful and crying for someone to give you a boost, to the uninformed observer.

If both men and women are allowed to lie, misrepresent their intentions, back out of their agreements, and undercut each other, in other words, to defect without penalty, this is where the game spirals to. And there is no obvious bottom.

Coordination to improve things is fuckin' hard, but it requires people to admit the problems that exist and to being impacted by them. And we can't even get to THAT step without people dogpiling on the ones who admit weakness.

And when the people most capable of effecting and coordinating change are also one of the few ones who benefit from the status quo (high value, somewhat sociopathic dudes), its even harder to shift. They don't see a need to adjust things.

I also appreciate your posts. Modern "dating" just seems like the mother of all coordination problems. And people have been playing defect for so long that we've forgotten what it's even like for cooperation to be possible. The guys bragging about their success seem like some "fisherman" who's bragging about how he made a bunch of quick cash using dynamite to exterminate an entire lake of fish.

I also appreciate your posts. Modern "dating" just seems like the mother of all coordination problems

There are some bigger ones, but this one will directly impact all the others over the long enough run.

I'm confident we'll 'figure it out' because the drive to reproduce and the forces of natural selection are not going to give in so easily. Going to suck for many, many people, though. Possibly including me.

But the CRAZY thing is we had the necessary social techs for this problem. There was a system that 'worked' (not optimal, not everyone was happy, but it was a decent equilibrium) and then dismantled most of it, and now we're stuck here because very few left even remember there being a better time.

Me, I only barely remember a time when it wasn't so openly hostile and the new technology (smartphones, social media) promised to improve things. And I feel like I was a naive idiot to think that way. But I also didn't have a good model of how intersex relations really work at scale.

I'm confident we'll 'figure it out' because the drive to reproduce and the forces of natural selection are not going to give in so easily.

Who is "we" in this context, who are going to figure it out? The human species… sure, this (alone, at least) probably won't result in the total extinction of *H. sapiens. Societies capable (and willing) to maintain post-Industrial Revolution tech levels? I'm not so sure. The West? Even less sure.

I think the subset of the human species that has the necessary skills to achieve interplanetary spaceflight is probably going to figure something out in time.

Whether that will be enough to keep the species as a whole at a post-industrial revolution tech level, though, I dunno.

Your point is scarily plausible, though.

I think the subset of the human species that has the necessary skills to achieve interplanetary spaceflight is probably going to figure something out in time.

What is your basis for concluding this? Because as I look at things, my view is that we most likely won't. (It seems to me like humanity has already peaked back in the late 20th century, things will never be that good again, and it's all downhill from here.)

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