The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
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Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
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Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
Jump in the discussion.
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I agree that US doctors are among the best in the world. However, I do not think that this is in any way related to the restrictions placed upon them. It's down to selection effects and an abundance of resources for training/practice.
It is definitely harder. Treating a family member for depression would be more challenging than slipping them a PPI for their heartburn. I do not think it is impossible, just something that needs to be done with care.
Hey unc, I was born with the rizz! Well, not really, because I was a nerdy kid and only discovered I'm good at chatting up women while in med school.
Dating within the workplace is fine, back in India. It still happens a lot in the UK! People tend to be cautious about it, but I still do not know how much of that is actually warranted or overblown concern. I'm reasonably confident that one of the interns at my workplace had a crush on me, but I was in a committed relationship. Shame, because she was really hot, but I wouldn't cheat, and I knew she was going to move away from Scotland soon.
It gets more difficult when you're a consultant, not because you're less attractive, but because accusations of impropriety are more easily leveled against you, especially if you approach a junior doctor.
I have never dated an actual patient, or asked one out. At most, I've offered medical advice to people I'm seeing, but I'd do that for anyone who asks politely.
Not taking a stance (although I have one), just suggesting some deliberation and care and thinking - it will serve you well with deciding where to put the boundaries.
Haha it's less about dating in the workplace and more about "ooooh I can fuck this girl in the closet" type trouble. Increasing puritanism and declining doctor respect have thankfully hampered this, but its not uncommon for young male doctors to get into trouble just by following along with flirting - but it's a small unit and now its awkward because you made a (mutual) pass at 1/4 the nurses.
An additional but somewhat unrelated element is this - if you have personal presence, competence, and authority you will start running into other kinds of trouble - people will listen to you because you are the boss.
This is a lesson for anyone in manager roles, but when you are in charge and people respect you....your offhand opinions, tastes, and requests become reality.
Say: "I think this pathology is annoying" and it becomes gospel. Get frustrated with a patient and let it out verbally during a meeting? Now a good chunk of people are going to think of and maybe even treat the patient worse.
"Will no one rid me of this turbulent priest?" can be an accident with sufficient poise and authority and those are things we often try and cultivate because they improve care quality.
I knew this was a thing before becoming a boss, but experiencing it in action from the boss side is eye-opening. There is no escaping our primate brains.
Yeah it's frightening. Suddenly people take what you say seriously. How you feel about something is important to people. Offhand suggestions quickly become reality. Sometimes I wonder if it is what being a beautiful woman is like haha.
The more management work I do the more I realize that it is one of the hardest skills, mostly orthogonal to other skills, not something we bother to train...and almost everyone sucks at it.
I am acceptable at management, but it's leadership where I'm adrift (and so much information/training acts like the former is the latter). Part of that is the nature of the job (public defender office)--I've never worked where the office seemed to have anything close to leadership, and it doesn't seem to be unique to places I've worked since the outside appearance of other offices is just as chaotic.
I feel like the best leaders don't need to think about being leaders at all.
That said - thinking about how to be a good leader gets you above so many bad leaders and basically all of those people you see complaints about on social media and reddit.
My father spent the back half of his career in an extremely high profile leadership role and I think every time I've seen him in the last few decades he's had the latest book nearby.
I don't know if any of them were particularly good but it seems like their is a million ways to go about it and a million opinions and the people who are any good invest a lot of training and time. Not really shocking but easy to forget and people tend to focus on technical skills and such a lot of the time.
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