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PaperclipPerfector  1mo ago (text post)   2892 thread views

Small-Scale Question Sunday for October 12, 2025

Do you have a dumb question that you're kind of embarrassed to ask in the main thread? Is there something you're just not sure about?

This is your opportunity to ask questions. No question too simple or too silly.

Culture war topics are accepted, and proposals for a better intro post are appreciated.

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I mostly lurk because I don't feel like I have much to contribute and everyone around here seems to know what they're talking about, or at least is good enough at rhetoric to fool me. And then I have this really bad habit of needing social approval in a way that downvotes cause me mental distress, even if I am positive I'm right. I'm kind of a coward online like that in a way that I am not irl.

And my study habits were probably unhealthy. I had a few friends in med school and was generally very well liked by people who knew me, but I had more than a few people say to me at some point in our 4th year "damn wsgy why weren't we better friends? You're a great hang!". I had kind of partied way too much in university and overcorrected. My (now) wife even mentioned what it was like to date me those first two years at our wedding. The rule was she could have me for an evening and overnight either Friday or Saturday and had a blanket invitation to stay over at my place on other days but I wasn't going to talk to her until 8pm and we had to be in bed by 10:30. Like she'd be hanging out on my couch watching TV while I ignored her with earplugs in my head. It got a laugh, appropriately.

I'm not actually too worried about the kids in the grand scheme of things. But it's like having one of your vital organs removed from your body and giving it a mind of its own. You can't help but get at least a bit neurotic about it getting damaged.

Maybe post more so that eventually your thin skin gets bruised into thick calluses.

Same boat here - fellow medico, don't post much here since i also feel not much to contribute.

Honestly I've used the downvotes from my sometimes half-cocked healthcare economics rants as part of exposure therapy for fear of online censure.

Our people pleasing and neuroticism needs treatment!

I mostly lurk because I don't feel like I have much to contribute and everyone around here seems to know what they're talking about, or at least is good enough at rhetoric to fool me.

Hey, having nothing useful to contribute doesn't stop some people! Don't let it dissuade you, you're probably wrong on that front.

But yes, having thick skin is a major benefit when it comes to regular participation on the Motte. I would encourage you to dip your toes in the water in the less contentious threads, like you're doing right now.

And my study habits were probably unhealthy. I had a few friends in med school and was generally very well liked by people who knew me, but I had more than a few people say to me at some point in our 4th year "damn wsgy why weren't we better friends? You're a great hang!". I had kind of partied way too much in university and overcorrected.

Such a shame. My parents would have loved to have you instead of me. Well, not because I partied too much (I didn't, at least in med school), but because they wished I'd studied.

I'm not actually too worried about the kids in the grand scheme of things. But it's like having one of your vital organs removed from your body and giving it a mind of its own. You can't help but get at least a bit neurotic about it getting damaged.

A fair point. It's easy for me to talk about adopting a laissez-faire attitude towards children I don't have. The changes parenthood provoke are scary, but also strangely comforting. One's own struggle and strife seem so inconsequential when there are little people who need you. Yours will turn out great!

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