The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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I really would like to become less high-strung. Talking to my roommate this morning it seems like we have opposite problems. I have no problem using willpower to actively engage in my desires, but I just can't seem to relax, ever. He can sleep for almost all day and is very chill, but can't seem to motivate himself to do anything that requires effort. Some things I'm thinking about trying.
1). A lot of my anxiety seems to come from open loops (i.e. procrastination). Maybe if I actually finish things I'll manage to decrease how stressed I feel.
2). The amount of open loops seem to come from an inability to say no to others or to my own marginal desires. Need to learn to focus on what counts.
3). Of course technology use doesn't help either. Aiming for less than an hour a day on my phone and seeing if that helps.
I would recommend a notebook for... well, everything. Minor tasks, major tasks, stray thoughts, something funny you saw, a culture war thought you had, a book/music recommendation you saw, something you're grateful for, something you need to order, anything. About an A5 size, but it depends on what you prefer (one that opens flat will be more useable than other kinds). Don't make a fetish of it like the bullet journal weirdos with 13 ink colors and all kinds of formatting. Just get it written down. Portion it off with some tabs for easier organization, but again, the important thing is writing it down.
I have a very good memory and rarely forget things, but find my stress level goes up the more things I'm carrying in my head. When I outsource it to a basic notebook I haul around, it makes life way easier. For example, during the week, I write down everything I want to do over the weekend, and then during the weekend I have my list to work on. Doing a long run turns into the satisfaction of the run itself plus crossing it off the list. Knowing I need to call my Grandma means I know to set time aside. On a weekday evening, I find it easier to avoid some post-work doomscrolling if I know the things I could be doing instead.
You can move from open loop to: put item on list>work on that item at planned time (or when free time pops up)>item finished>cross off item*>less stress. You'll also be able to see all the stuff on your list and balance that against what other people want or your marginal desires. It's powerful to look back at all the crap you've done during the year.
*It's very silly, but don't underestimate the value of getting to cross something off the list. It's almost as satisfying (if not moreso sometimes) than finishing the task itself.
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Have you tried to do time boxing? It has worked pretty well for me.
I have! The problem is calibrating what is an appropriate time box for a task, especially in lab where I'm not sure how long for example, dissections might take.
I meant more for your free time and all your projects. Relaxing more will probably leave you less high-strung at work as well.
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