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PaperclipPerfector  7d ago (text post)   26912 thread views

Culture War Roundup for the week of March 2, 2026

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If you told the founders that we were entering a needless war of foreign intervention 6000 miles away in Persia, they would consider their constitution a failure, and may be partial to my helpful revision.

"From the Halls of Montezu-uma,

to the shores of Tripoli,

but not twenty-five percent fa-arther,

cause that'd just be crazy!"

Seems like it ruins the original's meter and spirit.

Maybe focus on "needless"; don't throw everything at the wall to see what sticks.

Tripoli and Mexico were not interventions into foreign affairs as they secured the wellbeing of Americans exclusively. The lyrics are “we fight our country's battles […] to keep our honor clean”. Not, “we fight Israel’s battles and lose all our honor by killing 100 children in the first salvo, while also killing a Muslim leader in their holy month backhandedly while lying about negotiations, all while harming our own interests among Arab allies in the region”. Our plan going into Tripoli was to secure a deal to benefit Americans, not trying to kill everyone in the government and military and hoping for the best. Leave such dishonor to Israel. In any case this is a 1930s authorization, not really traditional enough for me.

to keep our honor clean

That ship sailed, and was turned away, in 1939. Unitedstatesian acts in defence of Israel can be justified many ways, but one of them is to restore that honour.

(Also, Iran supported the Houthis, and the Houthis touched our boats.)

Also if the place was still called "Persia", we likely wouldn't be having this issue.

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