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Culture War Roundup for the week of April 6, 2026

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IRAN WINS IRAN WAR

President Trump on Truth Social:

"Based on conversations with Prime Minister Shehbaz Sharif and Field Marshal Asim Munir, of Pakistan, and wherein they requested that I hold off the destructive force being sent tonight to Iran, and subject to the Islamic Republic of Iran agreeing to the COMPLETE, IMMEDIATE, and SAFE OPENING of the Strait of Hormuz, I agree to suspend the bombing and attack of Iran for a period of two weeks. This will be a double sided CEASEFIRE! The reason for doing so is that we have already met and exceeded all Military objectives, and are very far along with a definitive Agreement concerning Longterm PEACE with Iran, and PEACE in the Middle East. We received a 10 point proposal from Iran, and believe it is a workable basis on which to negotiate. Almost all of the various points of past contention have been agreed to between the United States and Iran, but a two week period will allow the Agreement to be finalized and consummated. On behalf of the United States of America, as President, and also representing the Countries of the Middle East, it is an Honor to have this Longterm problem close to resolution. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP"

Iran foreign minister Araghchi confirms the agreement.

  • No regime change

  • Assurances of "safe" passage through the strait of Hormuz, but no assurance of "free" passage.

  • Absolutely no mention of uranium, enrichment, or nuclear weapons.

  • No mention of proxies.

  • Possible sanctions relief.

This feels like an abusive relationship because my general feeling is (paraphrasing Glenn Greenwald a bit): I would happily donate to his victory parade if it genuinely means this is over. I don’t care if it’s wrong, let him feel like he won, just stop this nonsense.

But also: he needs to go. Impeachment or 25th amendment. Threatening to end a civilization after recklessly surrendering our sovereignty to a foreign, adversarial power (Israel) is not acceptable.