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Yeah I don't think the shower frequency is going to be the immediate disqualifying factor for the 140 IQ, open relationship comfortable tech 9-fig+ guy she's probably hoping for.
The open relationship is a complete non-starter for any guy she’s likely to be interested in that has a brain cell. Any woman who would front the idea of an open relationship either already has someone in mind, or is cheating on you and just doesn’t want to bother with having to hide things anymore. The only real men out there of her wish pool that would “tolerate” that are ones that don’t have options.
Open relationships are kind of an inverse bell curve thing for men, IMO.
If you're bottom percentile you'll go for them out of desperation. If you're top percentile and can trivially attract casual sex from other women, then it has an appeal again even if not everybody will go for it. If you're anywhere in the middle of sexual attractiveness it's inherently skewed where the woman in the relationship will have about 10000x the ease of attracting casual sex partners and it's thus skewed.
Though on the other hand you could just make the argument that somebody on the far right side of the curve is also incentivized to just pick a girl who's monogamous and tolerates his philandering.
In certain subcultures, being in this level means you feel you don't need an open relationship; you can just a) cheat or b) enforce a one-sided/Islamic polyamory model. It certainly doesn't mean "complicate my life by having someone sleep with my wife".
Much more common in the entertainment and athletic fields than the ones Aella frequents so she has that going for her I guess.
That's what 'pick a girl who's monogamous and tolerates the philandering' is gesturing to, though. I'd also imagine that even in top end tech circles that very few men have clout that transfers to instantaneous endless bitches in the way that an entertainment/athletic top ender has
My gut says many wives actually find the husband cheating as quite attractive. The Greenwich wife kind of knowing his 24 year old secretary from a state school is hanging her husband. It validates that he’s still high value.
I have a friend(The wife) who seems to have this predilection. Though it's not cheating because it is explicitly open on his side. But she seems to get off on knowing that other women find her husband hot and that he's high value enough to still get laid on the reg.
I personally don't think he's really the type to actually do it, and personally don't think he's that much of a looker besides being tall, but a girls gotta have her fantasies and as far I know he doesn't disabuse her of the notion.
Men don’t feel the same way because they want their kids to be their kids. But women know who the father is. So other women being interested in the father is confirmation they picked the right sperm donor. They don’t like it if they think he would leave her and make her destitute, but just sex isn’t as big of a threat.
The evo-psych explanation works in this case for me. I have theorized additional factors related to her personality that I think strongly impact why this occurs in their relationship.
The amusing thing to me is that these two are highly progressive (the husband is pretty much a champagne socialist) but lead a very trad lifestyle. She likes to spin it as being poly, but she's clearly just a cuck.
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