The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
-
Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
-
Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
-
Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
-
Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Notes -
So we've decided that we're going to vacate our lease. There are no penalties to be incurred because we already outstayed our original commitment and have been payining month to month since. Two leading options are a place that's much bigger and ostensibly nicer but in a worse neighborhood and a place that's either equivalent to what we have now or slightly worse than what we have now but in a nicer neighborhood and more expensive. I'm leaning towards the latter but better-half is arguing the former by appealing to my reflexive frugality and she might be winning.
My wife and I made a similar decision to move further away from my job to escape the yucky area we were in. Moved to a town half an hour away from work; nice community, a little pricier for a lower-quality abode, best decision ever.
Seriously, peace of mind is worth its weight in gold. The better half has some anxiety problems and just having a quiet, nice neighborhood has improved our QOL immensely. Cost is more than money, it's every little thing that you have to account for; I pay more in gas now, and time spent driving, but have to deal with fewer panic attacks and I'm not worried about broken glass on the sidewalk or other bullshit. Everything has a price, but mental clarity and peace of mind are often overlooked. This is my anecdotal experience, hope it helps.
The interesting thing to me is noticing how my own preferences have changed. 10 or even 5 years ago this would not have even been worth discussing. Moving from a duplex to a stand-alone 1 story house with garage for roughly the same monthly cost? Sign me up. But now I am not so certain.
The alternative is a condo in a complex which I see as a step down because we wont have a yard anymore, but it's also a nice complex in the nicer middle-class part of town with a playground and a community pool in easy walking distance.
Both options are within a 15-minute drive of our current place so in theory social upheaval should be minimal
Age changes your priorities.
I remember my twenties and early thirties. I thought nothing of staying in the worst inner-city suburb to live closer to work in a bigger place. I'd spend my holidays traveling to shithole countries and had some amazing (but in hindsight incredibly dangerous, risky and ultimately stupid) adventures.
Now I just want comfort and predictability. I hate dealing with the 'lowest common denominator' out in public and actively minimise my time engaging with new people that aren't pre-screened.
Broken glass, dodgy characters on the street; I just don't have time for that any more.
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link
More options
Context Copy link