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Wellness Wednesday for May 3, 2023

The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:

  • Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.

  • Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.

  • Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.

  • Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).

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A random yet poignant quote I once read was along the lines of- "There came a day in your life when your parents put you down and never picked you back up again."

I feel like I'm on my last "family vacation", in the sense of a vacation organized and sponsored by my parents with me and my brother along for the ride. My parents are getting old, the once plastered over cracks in the invincibility one puts up in front of one's kids are now glaringly obvious, and soon enough I'll be an independent adult living in an entirely different country two oceans away, lucky to make enough time to meet them once or twice a year.

At least it's going nicely, Thailand is a gorgeous place, and I think I've earned the right to kick back on the beach and sip a piná colada while the waves lap at my feet. Nice, but also melancholy, because I know it can't last.

Go hug your parents while you still have them. Or at least call. The thought that all this will sooner rather than later come to an end makes my heart ache.

This Wait But Why piece hit me on that front.

Nice to see a visual representation of how short something is, vs the usual how much money Elon Musk has.

Thanks, that piece always hits me in the feels. I'd call it inexplicable sadness, but I'm very clearly explicating it haha

I remember also reading something along the lines of, "one year, you will have your last summer. You won't realize that until a few years later". I was around 25 when I read that and realized how true it was.

Or this quote:

“Death is always on the way, but the fact that you don't know when it will arrive seems to take away from the finiteness of life. It's that terrible precision that we hate so much. But because we don't know, we get to think of life as an inexhaustible well. Yet everything happens a certain number of times, and a very small number, really. How many more times will you remember a certain afternoon of your childhood, some afternoon that's so deeply a part of your being that you can't even conceive of your life without it? Perhaps four or five times more. Perhaps not even. How many more times will you watch the full moon rise? Perhaps twenty. And yet it all seems limitless.”

It’s entirely about your own death, isn’t it? I get the same feeling about the 30 hugs from my parents as the 20 moon risings or the 700 pizzas left. Same one I get on my birthday or when I move out of an old apartment. It’s not about the ‘good times you had’ or the ‘people you leave behind’. That wouln’t matter if you (or, somewhat less importantly, them) had enough time.

Well, you and I can use science instead of jesus to hold onto the comforting illusion of eternal life. While I understand I can't live forever, I intend to try all the same.