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PaperclipPerfector  7mo ago (text post)   2402 thread views

Wellness Wednesday for September 20, 2023

The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:

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  • Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).

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They say “the worst thing she can say is no” but I asked a woman who I’m sorta friends with on a date via text and she read the message but hasn’t responded for 11 days and that’s so much worse than “no.”

I’m pretty sure I didn’t do anything wrong but I guess I just want feedback on this message as a sanity check.

Hi [name]

I just want to say that I think you're really kind and intelligent and interesting and pretty and I'd like to go on a date with you some time if you're interested.

If not, it's not a big deal, we can pretend this didn't happen and keep being friends lol

While I second all the excellent technical advice from more intelligent posters than i, it probably didn't matter. As my great aunt used to say, if you were born to be hung don't worry about drowning.

That is to say, while improved technique might have improved your odds, it probably wouldn't have made a difference to the outcome. Unless her desire to sleep with you was in perfect equipoise before the text, a bad one probably didn't ruin a good chance and a great one probably wouldn't salvage a longshot. The outcome was probably written in cards that were dealt long before you hit send.

Probably, yeah

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