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Friday Fun Thread for November 10, 2023

Be advised: this thread is not for serious in-depth discussion of weighty topics (we have a link for that), this thread is not for anything Culture War related. This thread is for Fun. You got jokes? Share 'em. You got silly questions? Ask 'em.

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You could do some military jobs!

  • Leave Papers, Please: Reviewing and processing leave forms (penalties for approving too many, or approving ones with errors)
  • Sweeping the same 50 square feet for an hour, making sure you look busy the whole time even though you've finished after 10 minutes.
  • Navigating a warship at night through a busy shipping lane, trying to keep your closest point of approach (CPA) greater than 2000 yards for every ship out there so you don't have to wake the Captain, whose standing orders require you to tell him if you're ever going to have a CPA under that.
  • Polishing your dress shoes
  • Mess crank: like Cooking Mama, but you have to cook 10x the quantity, some of the ingredients are rotten, and you can't tell the difference between tablespoons and teaspoons.
  • Leverage an LLM to determine how effective your speech is after telling your division not to get any DUIs over a holiday weekend. Additional levels could be to convince them not to buy a Dodge Charger at 26% APY, and not to send half your paycheck to the Filipino prostitute you met at the last port call.

Man, the one about keeping an eye on CPA was a huge part of my life for about three and a half years. We had a really thin standing orders binder, but the night orders always included the line about CPA and surface contacts.

It sure does stick with you. I haven't had to deal with that for over a decade but I still have strong feelings whenever I think about it.

One of the best things the Onion ever did

sweeping the same 50 square feet for an hour

You’ve just reinvented MMOs.