The Wednesday Wellness threads are meant to encourage users to ask for and provide advice and motivation to improve their lives. It isn't intended as a 'containment thread' and any content which could go here could instead be posted in its own thread. You could post:
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Requests for advice and / or encouragement. On basically any topic and for any scale of problem.
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Updates to let us know how you are doing. This provides valuable feedback on past advice / encouragement and will hopefully make people feel a little more motivated to follow through. If you want to be reminded to post your update, see the post titled 'update reminders', below.
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Advice. This can be in response to a request for advice or just something that you think could be generally useful for many people here.
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Encouragement. Probably best directed at specific users, but if you feel like just encouraging people in general I don't think anyone is going to object. I don't think I really need to say this, but just to be clear; encouragement should have a generally positive tone and not shame people (if people feel that shame might be an effective tool for motivating people, please discuss this so we can form a group consensus on how to use it rather than just trying it).
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Notes -
I'm moving to New Zealand in 8 days to start a (potentially) 2 year working holiday.
I guess I should be happy and excited. Instead I feel listless and anxious. I have lots of stuff I need to organize and get sorted that I just haven't. Other than my visa, flight, and a short hostel booking I don't have anything. Worse, I can't evade the thought that I'm going there to escape the things I don't like about myself and my life, and that I'm going to take my same issues there and replicate the same problems.
Other than that, bulk has kind of stalled out at about 83kg, which is always where I start to struggle to gain weight. That said I have made some small strength gains.
Good luck! The anxiety is normal. You will get used to making plans on the go and being more spontaneous fairly quickly. Try to be serious about using this time to break some undesirable habits and hopefully form new and more desirable ones. You will come across a lot of unattached young adventurous females so for example it’s a very good time to start being more daring with flirting :). Try to meet other people doing a similar travel and keep in touch. You will get homesick after a while and it’s nice to have some familiar faces once in a while. Try to be very open to experiences. Don’t say no to people who invite you to activities unless you have reasonable worries about your safety.
I'm gay so unattached women aren't really that appealing to me, though I'm willing to try anything once. I do want to try getting out of my shell more in that regard, though. I have very little sexual experience and I find the idea of sex more scary than exciting. I guess that's another pattern I want to try and break.
Thank you for the advice, though.
A bit of a personal question: how did you come to the conclusion that you are gay with very little sexual experience?
Because I am, and always have been, attracted to and sexually aroused by men. I kind of more deliberately put it together in adolescence. I just don't like having sex that much.
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