ser
7mo ago
IMO most immigrants I know (all of them are in software development, so very narrow selection) are doing much better than majority of their home bred peers. Yeah, you lose a couple years in grad school, but you're also jumping straight into a high paying job that puts you into the 80th percentile for income. Even in your example, the aspirational immigrant is entering their 30s with a '$300k buffer', that puts you ahead majority of Americans. The only aspect that immigrants lack at is social - most don't have great social groups or romantic relationships, but I don't think that can be excused to the immigrant hardships to the full extent. Plenty of my American friends in their mid 20s have few friends and maybe 1-2 (if any) relationships under their belt, so I think that's just how current generation is.
Got a chance to try propranolol for my social anxiety. Wow, what a fucking miracle. My social anxiety usually manifests itself through physical symptoms - increased heartbeat, shaking, heat flashes, stuttering, running out of breath, etc. 20mg got rid of all of that. Usually I get locked into the anxiety cycle where my symptoms cause me to start getting worried that people will notice my abnormal behavior, thus causing more physical symptoms. Now that I didn't have any physical symptoms, the anxious thoughts were there but didn't have much effect on me. Essentially, in worst scenarios, social anxiety would cause me to go into overdrive physically but now it just makes me a slightly less talkative than usual normal human. Really curious if exposure therapy while on propranolol would have any long term positive effects.
It looks like your dryness and hesitance is what turned her off from you. She was trying to push boundaries and get more personal with you and you didn't match her energy, so she either assumed you're not interested in her or she did too much and got embarrassed. She found you, reached out and made the conversation more intimate and what she got in return is some tiptoeing and dry responses.
It's bad when your first message to a woman is "omg you're so hot I can't wait to fuck you". Yeah don't do that. It's not bad when she's the one initiating it, it's essentially a green light for you to take it there.
Stop doing this. You're so worried to not come off as a creep, it probably makes you even more of a creep. I'm not saying you should be DMing women "I need a footjob" 10 messages in, but it's ok to show interest and be flirty. If you're dry, all it tells them is that you're not interested at best or a boring loser at worst. If it's on the apps, they've got 10 other men they can talk to right at this moment, they won't waste time to discover the real you.
If you're actually into these women and want to meet them, stop being dry and show some interest ffs
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