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Culture War Roundup for the week of August 12, 2024

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I have an idea for an invention that will revolutionize the fashion industry in the Northeast. It's a garment that women can wear underneath their shirts that will support their fleshy bosoms. This invention would have the benefit of further concealing the breasts, but making them appear firmer and fuller, and preventing sagging when women approach old age.

Seriously, I feel like the modern urban world has forgotten about the bra. When I'm in big Northeast cities riding public transit, I rarely see a single woman wearing one. What's with this development? Is it some feminism thing? Is it fashion? Is it just that it's hot these days? Was the bra always worthless but women wore it out of modesty, but now there's no more modesty? I would guess that is some feminist notion that bras are a relic of patriarchy, and that has influenced fashion over the last decade to make it less fashionable. And that this has enabled the more lazy women out there to just not bother wearing it, and in turn, the link between bras and female modesty is disappearing (along with maybe the modesty itself, or the idea that women should be modest).

My partner has told me that bras can be uncomfortable for women to wear. Admittedly, as a guy, I don't quite understand much about them other than they support a woman's breasts.

My question to you is, what impact does it have on you personally if more women stop wearing bras? Men don't get scrutinized for their nipples being visible in public. Why should women?

No, it's not "fair" and it's not "equal," but women's bodies are more sexual than men's because of the differences between male and female sexuality.

Homie, women's thighs are sexual. Women's butts in tight jeans are sexual. The curve of a woman's silhouette in a fitted dress is sexual. Lipstick is sexual. Women's clothing/lack of clothing can accentuate or attenuate these features of their bodies in ways that actually make a huge difference in the amount of visual stimulation that is flooding into a man's eyes.

Apparently women aren't exactly privy to this? But try looking at a target and notice how naturally your eyes are drawn to the center.

I'm not trying to go Sharia on everyone's asses, but I am getting older, and the share of women in my life who are younger than me is only going to keep increasing. Women's fashion was fun when I was a horny teenager. As a married man however it's incredibly distracting, and I'm not allowed to talk about it.

Are you sure women's bodies aren't "more sexual" than men's because of ... men? Maybe you're wanting to require us to wear bras because of your issues, not ours?

For what it's worth, typically not wearing a bra doesn't accentuate breasts. If, as a woman, I want to accentuate my breasts, I'm involving a bra. Not wearing a bra is them in their natural state. If I want to accentuate my lips, I'll wear lipstick. Eyes, eyeshadow. If I'm not wearing lipstick or eyeshadow? It's just my face. I'm not accentuating anything. My face is with me everywhere I go. Like my breasts. Can't leave home without them.

Are you sure women's bodies aren't "more sexual" than men's because of ... men? Maybe you're wanting to require us to wear bras because of your issues, not ours?

I'm clearly in agreement with you that it's men's "issue." Your own bedroom, where you're not being perceived by anyone else, because of this, does not have a dress code. Indeed: men, and more specifically men's visual perceptions of women, are precisely why women's bodies are more sexual than men's. But...you do know you share a world with men?

This is obviously a sensitive topic. And it's not women's fault that they are (by default) effortlessly pleasing to look at. I'm just saying that women's bodies have greater and more pronounced visibly sexual qualities than men's, and this fact has social consequences that the sexes should negotiate with each other cooperatively.

In the past cultures have put guidelines on a woman's appearance, without negotiating with women about it. And now the shoe is simply on the other foot: women's visible sexual qualities are a man's problem, and he should simply ignore the bombardment of visual stimulation as women largely fail to realize just how potent the stimuli are because men have been socialized into silence on the matter. There's gotta be something in the middle.

In the past cultures have put guidelines on a woman's appearance, without negotiating with women about it. And now the shoe is simply on the other foot: women's visible sexual qualities are a man's problem, and he should simply ignore the bombardment of visual stimulation as women largely fail to realize just how potent the stimuli are because men have been socialized into silence on the matter. There's gotta be something in the middle.

Why do you think women fail to realize that men are visually stimulated? We're told this constantly. We're told that if a man acts out, it's because of what a woman wore, how she looked. Sure, men shouldn't rape, but did you see what she was wearing?

Given different cultural standards in modesty and dress, I don't believe that cleavage, breasts, legs, or any particular piece of a woman's body is just instant "brain off, hormones gone crazy" for men. It's all what we're used to.

Why do you think women fail to realize that men are visually stimulated? We're told this constantly. We're told that if a man acts out, it's because of what a woman wore, how she looked. Sure, men shouldn't rape, but did you see what she was wearing?

This may have been a point worth hearing in the past, but it seems wildly out of date by now. Anyone even thinking of trying to use that argument in public would immediately catch a ton of shit. Maybe a recent Muslim immigrant could get away with it, though it will probably depend on what his politics are.

I wish it were wildly out of date.

Girls and women are very clearly told that what we wear makes us responsible for men's behavior towards us.

See the comment above: "Wearing clothing that draws attention to your sexual characteristics and then complaining when people give you sexual attention (eg, lewding, catcalling) is sexual harassment. On your end. You initiated it, you are responsible for it."

What's clothing that draws attention to our sexual characteristics? Anything that makes it clear we have breasts, legs, butt, any part of our anatomy a man might find arousing.

That's not really the same as "Sure, men shouldn't rape, but did you see what she was wearing?". Also a niche forum founded for the explicit purpose of debating controversial opinions is not a good barometer for what's socially acceptable. Show me someone saying that face to face in polite company, or even just on some mainstream Reddit sub.