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PaperclipPerfector  19d ago (text post)   2044 thread views

Small-Scale Question Sunday for May 4, 2025

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When is it acceptable to pee on the side of the road?

I've got 4 small kids (3 boys + 1 girl; only the girls is in diapers). We do a 2 hour road trip down to the grandparents about every other weekend. We always make them go to the bathroom before we leave, but we still have pee emergencies pretty much every trip.

For us, peeing on the side of the freeway is basically a must. If we try to find a proper bathroom, that's easily a 20+ minute detour. Driving to the bathroom is maybe 5 minutes, but then wrangling the problematic kid(s) is much more difficult in a dirty garage bathroom than on the side of the road. (I can't count the number of times I've had a kid wipe their junk on a public restroom toilet and then I have to do a serious disinfection...)

So my policy for side-of-road peeing is:

  1. It has to be safe to stop.

  2. There shouldn't be pedestrians around that can see us. (So this means no peeing on non-freeway type streets, and certain sections of freeway are also off limits.)

  3. There has to be "nature" to pee on. Some amount of grass/dirt is okay, but a tree is best. If we're on the stretch of the I5 in Irvine, where there's concrete everywhere, we won't stop. (This is partly related to pts 1+2.)

I realized on this week's roadtrip that I've never seen another car parked with the kids out peeing. Am I breaking some sort of major taboo here?

I'm also not sure what I'll do once the girl isn't wearing diapers, and whether I'll allow / force her to pee on the side of the road.

My personal belief is that one of the main advantages of being a man is the right to pee pretty much anywhere as long as you're discreet. It hurts nobody and I actually think it's enjoyable. I wouldn't pee on a stranger's lawn but that's about my only limitation.

That said I am perplexed that you have an emergency every trip. My children regularly handle 10+ hour road trips with no issues, and they have their own water bottles. It's also never a 20 minute detour for a gas station for me, maybe 3 minutes.

I think some kids/families are just biologically different. When any of my kids were under 4, I was nervous when we hit a stretch of highways with more than 30 minutes until the next gas station. Some people just gotta go when they gotta go.

My younger kid is like that - she doesn't want to go unless she's actually experiencing the "gotta go right now!" feeling, and will argue and get mad if any adult tells her, "go now regardless, we'll be on the road two hours and I don't want to have to make pit stops."

The arguing is what drives me nuts. It's surely karma for my behavior at that age.

kids are the ultimate karma - no matter what pissed off others about you, you will get to experience it all day, everyday, in a mini-mirror.

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