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I have four kids. I like hanging out with and taking care of my kids. It gets more fun after they turn 1, then even more after they turn 7, then still more after 10.
It's really not that bad. It's hard, but so is training for a marathon, learning violin, studying Chinese, learning to sail, reading literary fiction, really anything worthwhile in life. I personally do not think a life of video games, Netflix, international vacations to the rest of the now-Disnified tourist-friendly world, concerts, craft beer bar visits, escape rooms, or whatever single millennials my age are doing these days would be very fulfilling for me personally. I actually WFH expressly because I want to help my wife (a SAHM) cook, clean, and take care of the kids. We also do part time homeschooling and plan to switch to full homeschooling soon. Neither of us had to do any of this, we both have careers and made enough money to pay for daycare and still have disposable income. We chose to. I promise you we are not doing it under duress.
Also, there isn't really a stigma against saying you don't want to have kids anymore. Everyone in my entire company AFAIK has 0-2 kids. Probably 70% of coworkers over 30 are childless. Not having kids is the normal default now. Having kids at all is slightly unusual. Having enough kids that you must orient your life around raising them instead of throwing them into daycare is on par with being a Scientologist or something. People clearly think I'm a little insane. But I've also been surprised at the small minority who express admiration and jealousy. Not everyone thinks the way you do.
How do you do part time homeschooling? Can you explain how that works? I thought it was an either or kind of thing?
It's very common for older kids. Either homeschool for most things with some classes(either online, or community college, or...) taken on the side, or a dedicated hybrid program(readily available but often requires a religious test).
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I didn't phrase it well. It's really just supplemental education at home, no exams or registration with the government. Just extra reading and study in addition to what theyre doing at school. Currently just religion, English, and history.
It might be worth looking for exams your kids can sit, if they're learning more regardless, to get some recognition for it. My son studied a bunch of math on his own during Covid, but then was bored silly when all his school would offer him was at his grade level. Fortunately the local University has a Credit-By-Exam process for high school subjects, and a decent Algebra I score was enough to get him jumped to Geometry the next year.
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Ahh I see, gotcha. Good stuff. We want to homeschool ourselves so we’ll see how it goes. Good luck going full time into it.
Thanks. I will try to report back after a year. Maybe do a small write-up in the Small Questions thread.
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I have 4 as well and people think I’m crazy
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Playing an instrument, playing a sport, learning an instrument, or learning a language is what a ton of people do just for fun, in addition to vidya and netflix sessions. Honestly none of these things are really hard if you're operating on a hobbyist level. These are all things where you can goof off while doing it and get gradually better. In a sense it's the same as vidya - after sinking 300 hours into the game, you'll be a lot better, though there's still going to be a massive chasm between you and people who practice seriously to play competitive (being sweaty and tryhard is of course different from practicing seriously to get good).
This is true, but there is still a stigma around saying that kids suck or that you hate taking care of them. Everyone will put up the sign saying that their little bundles of terror are perfect and they love taking care of them.
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