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Culture War Roundup for the week of February 23, 2026

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It's that any time there's a large age difference there's a presumption that the guy is in it for the sex and the woman is in it for the money.

This is a big part of it. Consider also that an older, wealthy man is typically going to have existing children/heirs who are expecting his resources and attention, which is now being taken by a young floozy.

which is now being taken by a young floozy.

My research into step-children on various adult oriented documentary websites suggests this outcome is often welcomed by the male heirs.

My research into step-children on various adult oriented documentary websites suggests this outcome is often welcomed by the male heirs.

Now that you mention it, I remember that this issue was played for laughs in the 80s movie "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure." The two main characters (Bill & Ted) were high school students and the father of one of them got married to a woman who Bill & Ted had known as a hottie in their high school who was a few years ahead of them.

I wonder if a movie with a gag like this would get green-lighted in 2026. I tend to doubt it.

I remember that. What was unconscionable was the father and his young wife getting it on Bill (or Ted's) room!

I was laughing about that to myself the other day in the FFT, when @FtttG said that men have fallen out of lust with lesbians because they saw actual lesbians and they weren't that hot, and then I thought of the average stepmom...

I can't imagine the average stepmom is especially attractive, but how many stepmoms can you name off the top of your head? It's not a highly visible identity in the way that "lesbian" or "black" is: no woman introduces herself by stating that she's a stepmom. Probably the only time we hear about women raising the children of her husband from a previous marriage/relationship, it's a celebrity, who are selected for being attractive. Hell, even searching the term "stepmom" (specialised websites excepted) would probably just bring you to the movie Stepmom (starring a young Julia Roberts). Most of the time you hear the word "stepmom" used in the media, it's in reference to an unusually attractive woman!

(Funnily enough, the primary context in which I heard the word "stepmother" growing up was the "wicked stepmother" archetype in Grimm's fairy tales: that being an evil, sexy woman who seduces a hapless man and persuades him to abandon or kill his children. I wonder to what extent porn studios are consciously playing on this archetype. Certainly the "stepmom" in porn videos is a wicked, conniving seducer.)

Personally, the incest/faux-incest trend in porn never appealed to me – I just find it creepy and off-putting, and downright paedophilic when it comes to the "stepdaughter" stuff.

Though weirdly, this is one of the scandals for which St Paul rebukes the unruly Corinthians:

5 It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and of a kind that is not tolerated even among pagans, for a man has his father's wife. 2 And you are arrogant! Ought you not rather to mourn? Let him who has done this be removed from among you.

And given the restrictions on this in the Old Testament, clearly in ancient times there were enough cases of men with adult sons marrying much younger women (maybe as second wives or concubines) that this was a real problem where propinquity led to affections between the parties closer in age.

6 “None of you shall approach any one of his close relatives to uncover nakedness. I am the Lord. 7 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your father, which is the nakedness of your mother; she is your mother, you shall not uncover her nakedness. 8 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your father's wife; it is your father's nakedness. 9 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your sister, your father's daughter or your mother's daughter, whether brought up in the family or in another home. 10 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your son's daughter or of your daughter's daughter, for their nakedness is your own nakedness. 11 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your father's wife's daughter, brought up in your father's family, since she is your sister. 12 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your father's sister; she is your father's relative. 13 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your mother's sister, for she is your mother's relative. 14 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your father's brother, that is, you shall not approach his wife; she is your aunt. 15 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your daughter-in-law; she is your son's wife, you shall not uncover her nakedness. 16 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your brother's wife; it is your brother's nakedness. 17 You shall not uncover the nakedness of a woman and of her daughter, and you shall not take her son's daughter or her daughter's daughter to uncover her nakedness; they are relatives; it is depravity. 18 And you shall not take a woman as a rival wife to her sister, uncovering her nakedness while her sister is still alive.

11 “If a man lies with his father's wife, he has uncovered his father's nakedness; both of them shall surely be put to death; their blood is upon them. 12 If a man lies with his daughter-in-law, both of them shall surely be put to death; they have committed perversion; their blood is upon them. ... 14 If a man takes a woman and her mother also, it is depravity; he and they shall be burned with fire, that there may be no depravity among you.

17 “If a man takes his sister, a daughter of his father or a daughter of his mother, and sees her nakedness, and she sees his nakedness, it is a disgrace, and they shall be cut off in the sight of the children of their people. He has uncovered his sister's nakedness, and he shall bear his iniquity. ...19 You shall not uncover the nakedness of your mother's sister or of your father's sister, for that is to make naked one's relative; they shall bear their iniquity. 20 If a man lies with his uncle's wife, he has uncovered his uncle's nakedness; they shall bear their sin; they shall die childless. 21 If a man takes his brother's wife, it is impurity. He has uncovered his brother's nakedness; they shall be childless.

You shall not uncover the nakedness of your son's daughter or of your daughter's daughter, for their nakedness is your own nakedness.

Interesting that this is the only one that refers to uncovering your own nakedness. Does that mean masturbation? Or is it really forbidding looking at yourself naked?

but how many stepmoms can you name off the top of your head?

...I feel like I can name five or six that I know closely pretty easily? I'm not even sure how to process this question. Do you not know divorced people?

There were (probably still are) tabloid scandal stories about step parents and step children having relationships/getting married. The calibre of people involved, we're not talking supermodel looks. Underclass types doing underclass things.

I mean, don't forget one of our greatest living directors.

That was an entire mess and a half, and I don't even want to touch the tangle of accusations and counter-accusations going on there.

I personally know several divorcés, but off the top of my head can only think of one stepmom.

I suppose what I was really getting at is that being a stepmom is rarely the most salient fact about a person in a way that "lesbian" is. "Lesbian" is a highly salient trait about Megan Rapinoe, such that when someone says "lesbian" she might be one of the first people who pops into your head. Meanwhile "bookkeeping clerk" isn't a very salient trait about someone. If someone says "bookkeeping clerk" you would probably draw a blank, even though statistically most people surely know at least one woman in that line of work. I think "stepmom" is more like "bookkeeping clerk" than it is like "lesbian".

Huh. I guess I know a lot more blended families than average or something. Just on my block growing up I can think of three or four stepmoms of friends of mine. Stepmom is a very salient fact from the perspective of the stepchild or their peers.

But once it's the porn genre it's a very salient fact about the person. If I clicked on "hot stepmom porn" I know a lot of facts about that woman.

My point is more that I'm not sure that the differential between PornLesbian and RealLesbian is any bigger than PornStepmom and RealStepmom, or PornTeacher and RealTeacher. There's a few hot ones that form the basis of our fantasies.

Isn't "hot step-whatever" porn just a way of getting around the incest taboo? Close enough to be titillating to the person who wants kinky thrills, but far enough to keep the law off.

One main difference is that PornLesbians look conventionally feminine, whereas RealLesbians usually don't. RealStepmoms will be unlike PornStepmoms in many ways (less attractive, smaller breasts, less sultry, less promiscuous), but both tend to be conventionally feminine in terms of dress sense, hairstyle, makeup etc. "Just like the real thing, but hotter" is a smaller gap than "hotter than the real thing and with a completely different dress sense, hairstyle etc.".

It used to be conventional wisdom that you can separate lesbians into two categories -- femme and butch. The latter do not look conventionally feminine but the former do. I'm fairly sure these categories do in fact exist.

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