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Content warning: An undercooked, rambly post with minimal editing but it's a slow news day, clearly. Also, sexual abuse, so I don't bury the lede entirely.
I recently heard about (but didn't personally review) a very interesting patient. Same Indian hospital I mentioned visiting, but now in the ward itself and not the clinic.
The most senior doctor, the lady in charge of the department, was interrogating the interns and trainees who had reviewed her. While I was standing around and trying to look present.
I initially heard:
At this point, the senior doctor asked me for my thoughts. I jumped, I had been thinking about a cute kitten I saw, one that had not been subject to the same teratogenicity seen in the ones hanging around in the medicine ward upstairs, as observed my myself while an intern. Maybe I had been wondering if I should pirate Mewgenics. Anyway, digression over.
"Uh.. Why was she admitted in the first place?" I asked. Both a genuine question, and an attempt to avoid being caught zoning out. This sounded... normal, or at least I would not hospitalize someone for doing this. It's 2026, even I, once committed to abstinence from brainrot, occasionally browse Reels. It sounded like normal teenage girl stuff.
She had been subject to sexual abuse, quite recently. My teacher (because I was present in my capacity as a very slightly overqualified medical student, at least in practice) didn't immediately elaborate.
But I soon learned, once again from being there, albeit with clearer ears:
Then the bombshell: she had accused her father and grandfather of sexual abuse, on the basis of viewing porn and probably material trying to raise awareness. This was probably not the reason she was admitted (though I didn't specifically ask). She said her father had, a few years back, touched her privates. He did not do anything (more) explicitly sexual. She claimed her grandpa had once embraced her, taken her head, and rested it against her chest. That is all. She had not found it objectionable at the time.
We debated this for a bit. The general consensus, which I agree with, is that her grandpa was doing normal loving grandpa things. I do not want to accuse her father of abuse.
Her mood had not been obviously bad. She had, after all, been making reels in the ward.
At this point, the senior doctor mentioned ADHD, and pointed at excessive phone use as an example of a driving need to avoid boredom. I looked around shiftily, I have ADHD myself, and my screen-time has been, by objective report, very high. But I did ask if she was contemplating EUPD/BPD. Okay, I did make an error, it was at this point that I learned she was 13, which did make me raise an eyebrow.
She said that she was open to the idea, but the patient was too young at present (this is true, I checked since I didn't want to trust my memory more than I can throw it). Good suggestion, she told me, but people can grow out of things, and upbringing and support can make all the difference at that age. I have no reason to disagree. I also mentally considered histrionic personality disorder back then, but the same issues with age arise. I do not believe she was on meds, though I could be wrong.
I did not promise that there was a point to this essay, but I did find the whole situation thought provoking. Maybe the main reason she was admitted was safe-guarding and observation, I am confident that is part of the reason at least. Nobody pinned a firm diagnosis where I could see it. It just struck me as an example of a grey area, all the more unusual for an Indian context. You might be okay with the idea of a 13 yo girl having a boyfriend, and maybe having sex with said boyfriend. Maybe my teacher was slightly out of touch, and being on the phone all day is now entirely normal. I am guilty, though I tell myself I use it productively. Maybe being deeply jealous of her sister is a normal enough reaction to circumstances. I do not have the full picture - because I have ADHD and the ward was noisy. Mostly the ADHD.
I will, both for personal and professional curiosity, and by (imagined) public demand, seek answers if I ever visit again, or maybe just text my new friends. What I found the most concerning, at least from memory, is the potential hypersexuality, which genuinely can be a sign of past sexual abuse, even if she's just about old enough for it to be debatable.
This post brought to you by a large dose of Ritalin, after I made the mistake of taking it while too tired to actually study. I hope no one predicted this halfway through the essay.
I make no judgement either way but this does remind me of two situations from middle school:
On the one sex ed class we had when I was 14 or so, one guy in our class made a fairly plausible claim of having had sex and that it was with an older girl when he was 12 years old at some summer camp. The reaction was mostly "nah, you're trying to fool us" with a bit of "12? You sure started young". At no point was any sort of abuse considered. Another guy had a steady girlfriend of the same age and the only reaction was "lucky you!" (she was quite pretty).
When I was in 9th grade (ie. 15 years old) I remember a girl in another class having a steady boyfriend who was in 7th grade in the same school. Our reaction was "He's quite young. I wonder what she sees in him?" I do recall them kissing publicly but we didn't exactly ask if they had sex.
I started wishing for that for myself shortly before my 12th birthday, so maybe he just got lucky. Although the odds of him lying are also high, I knew a few guys when I was that age who would lie like that. They were also the type of people where it was plausible. They liked to make up ghost stories and stuff too so I knew they were fabulists.
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Look, I fantasized about sleeping with my (female) teachers from 8th grade onwards, it was a sex-segregated institute, and I had sadly little contact with female peers. I was too chubby and acne ridden for a teacher seducing me to be a remotely realistic prospect. But if they had been blind and demented, I don't think I'd have accused them of sexual assault. I'd be hell-yeahing with the boys.
A gay art tutor once tried and (failed) molesting me, and at no point was I into it. My parents fired him, but did not press charges as I wish they had. It probably wouldn't have gone anywhere.
I still remain a MILF-enjoyer, and most of my serious relationships were with slightly older women. Sadly, MILF increasingly just means women my age, both because of a regression in the strictness of standards on porn sites, and the unkind passage of time.
Man, that's just weird...
that you had hot enough teachers for that. We sure didn't until perhaps senior high school but by then I was far too distracted by the girl sitting in front of me who wore deliciously tight jeans. She's also the reason why I still remember the lyrics to this song (they were written in the backside of the seat she sat in in that class).
Or maybe you truly are a MILF enjoyer. Not that I judge, considering how many of my peers are nowadays MILFs.
You had me going at the start.
Look, for once I'm the person grading on a curve. There's an apocryphal story/meme of a man being so horny while internet deprived that he jerked off to a smoke detector, describing it as a "ceiling titty". At that age, I could relate, I am much calmer these days, and I do not miss having a raging libido with no real outlet.
But yeah, a few of the teachers could get it. Still would, except that they've probably gone from MILFs to GILFs. It has been a while, and I am not willing to start a relationship with such a problematic age gap (it would be elder abuse).
At that age, MILF meant women from 27 to 45. And porn actresses somehow go from "barely legal" to "MILFs" on the lower side of that range, with almost nothing in between, so maybe I was prescient.
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